I had a breakthrough with weight. I have been so focused on BMI for the last year that I've been fighting like hell to get back to a healthy weight according to BMI (I tend to float 10 pounds north of that right now). I was briefly 170 pounds when I was 22, but I realized this week that this was unsustainable. I was eating almost entirely raw vegetables and Israeli street food, and I walked up to 15 miles a day every day. While that sounds amazing, I was constantly sick (fevers, flu, parasites, constant fainting, chills, turned blue all the time). In fact, I was recovering from a middle eastern parasite when I hit my low weight of 170.4. That whole year, my hip bones and collar bones protruded. The hinge of my jaw stuck out of my face in pictures. My skin was grey. I wanted so desperately to be in the healthy BMI range that I ignored how skeletal and sick I was looking and how gross I was feeling, and I only noticed how scary I looked looking back on pictures from my year abroad this week.
I realized this week that since bouncing around in the 180s for a year or so, I haven't been sick at all. My complexion is better. I have defined features, but not skeletal. I did my body measurements--everything I've used except BMI says I'm a healthy weight, body fat percentage, etc. My ratios are good, I have a flat stomach (except for a small pouch of loose skin in my lower tummy), and I wear a size small to medium on average, even though I'm nearly 6 feet tall. That, and my fitness is the best it's ever been. I exercise nearly every day, sometimes taking walks or hikes that last four or more hours in the hills of northern Manhattan.
Because of all this, I've decided I'm done losing weight, and I'm done obsessing over the scale. I'm going to weigh myself every other Wednesday just to check in, and if I'm 190 or higher I'll weigh in once a week until I'm squarely back in the 180s. At the end of the day, BMI isn't the end all be all, and I refuse to be miserable and be a slave to a weight that isn't sustainable or healthy for me. I'd much rather live in a comfortable range that keeps me healthy, even if it is 10 or so pounds overweight according to BMI.
After three years and two months of attempted or successful weight loss , I'm officially maintaining. And I've decided this alone, quarantined in my apartment. So I figured I'd share here, because I'm really proud. I've lost around 100lbs from my high weight and have functionally maintained that for a year, but now am officially making the switch.
Hope everyone is safe and healthy out there. Be well, y'all.
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