Tuesday, April 14, 2020

Struggling with body image after losing it

I apologise if this is the wrong place to post.

Since December 2019, I have lost about 8kg through a mixture of CICO and taking up powerlifting. I have also converted a lot of fat to muscle. For me, this was enough to turn me from slightly chubby, to reasonably toned and slim. This was a look I’d been aspiring to for years, and I was thrilled with how I looked and felt. I have maintained the weight loss (if not the tone) during quarantine, and know I haven’t gained weight. However, when I look in the mirror I am unhappy with myself again. I no longer see myself as slim, even though my clothes fit the same, and I honestly don’t really see a difference from before the weight loss, even though logically I know I am much thinner. I literally see weight that I know isn’t there, for example I see my thighs as being exactly the same size as last November despite that being impossible. As a direct result, I have started being strange about food in a way I never have been before, and am having to stop myself from over-exercising. My weight is on my mind more often than I can remember it being in the past, and I hate it as this was the way I always wanted to look. I just want to go back to being happy, but I feel the only way to do that is to lose more, which logically I know I shouldn’t try and do.

Does anyone have any experience or suggestions of how to deal with this? Is this a common reaction to weight loss, or just quarantine talking?

Thank you so much for reading, just typing this out has lifted a weight from my mind.

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