Hi guys, first post Im'ma give it my best to make the post worthwhile!
I stepped on the scale at work today to see 99kg (Going to use lbs from here on but my scale at work is kg and it was a nice number!). I literally thought the scale was wrong at first. "Is this one broken?" was the first through to go through my head. However this is the culmination of about two years of "work" and one year of actual work.
2 years ago I met a lady who seemed to be a dream come true for me. And while I'm tempted to go into the long, sad story, that's not the point of this post nor subreddit. It ended with, "Well Clay, I thought you were going to lose weight and you really haven't. You know I'm not attracted to fat guys. Goodbye."
I was devastated. When I met her I was 270lbs. This was my biggest in over a decade and a half and I was determined to work on it anyway. I had previously gone from 300lbs to 199lbs in college. So the journey began!
Over the year i tried various things but just couldn't get down below 250! I tried one meal a day and keto, primarily. However I was struggling. The one meal a day was often 2k calories or more, and on keto I was hamstrung by family coming over to offer free food or ask me to pick them up something. (It bears mentioning my stepdad has been losing weight for no really well explained reason and mom was having me get him things like milkshakes to give him calories.... I was too weak to not say no to milkshakes!) I was getting frustrated and 250lb was a "checkpoint weight" for g/f and I that I. Just. Couldn't. Reach.
I tried adding weightlifting to my routine, biking, etc. If you think about the timeline...guess what happened around this time? Yup, Covid. It became difficult to go the gym but i lucked up with a friend of mine having a home gym but it wasn't as good as PF. Then I had KNEE SURGERY for a torn meniscus from a fall before. I had a lot going against me and due to that I struggled.
The break up came and went as described above. After a bit of a pity party, I started to get mad... I started to get pissed and I started to get motivated! Aaron Bleyaert famously tweeted something to the effect of "Want to lose weight? Get your heart broken!" Oh, I found it! and boy do I agree with that advice now. I had always planned on getting back on keto, but suddenly the hunger pains didn't bother me as bad. The food was less an issue than me worrying about self improvement. I also got back to work which helped a lot, having a routine and schedule (plus on this contract i was on my feet a lot.) I essentially combined Keto with OMAD, with the small exception of allowing myself some kind of snack if I were hungry. Only enough to not be hungry though! I'm talking about one keto peanut butter cup or one smoked sausage, that kinda thing.
The weight started coming off! Before I knew it I had blasted past the 250lb barrier that had stopped me before. I found myself eating less, even for my one meal. I found that, for the most part, my cravings went away. I do allow myself one cheat meal a week, though. It is enough to keep me satisfied and I find it doesn't blow my ketosis. I eat more veggies than off keto. I honestly think i can eat like this forever.
So, motivation coming from heartache is not something that most people would want/can/need to experience. I think the motivation needs to come from within. Maybe having a boost is fine but at the end of the day it comes from you! This is encapsulated in something that happened to me early this year. I was nearing the end of my contract and that meant a cross country drive. I figured "eh I'm already gonna have to eat out on the drive, might as well start now! (Almost two weeks early)" I had myself a few off-keto meals and then...
I was holding a platter of sushi from a grocery store. I love sushi. Then why am I borderline in tears holding this sushi? I was feeling like shit. I was thinking of the progress I had made and how these past few meals was ruining it. I knew I was bumping up on ruining my ketosis and, while confident I could reign it in eventually, I do not have a 100% success rate.... But I hadn't had sushi in a while...
I wish I could tell you I put the sushi down. I wish I could at least tell you it was some amazing sushi that was totally worth it. It wasn't. It was garbage supermarket-grade sushi and I bought it and eat that shit like the fatass I was, seasoning it not with soy sauce but the tears of my own weakness. BUT! I decided to get my shit back together, stop right after that and even did my best to stay on keto during the drive home.
Honestly, I think that's about all there is to say. After that incident I've been very strict on myself to not go off any more than my usual cheat days. I also eat well for my meal. I've gotten to where my food is just a thing I do, not something I think about all day, everyday. And today, after not even really worrying about weighing myself often anymore, I checked on myself and saw 99kg... NINETY-NINE kilograms! Want some NSV? My old 42in pants I have worn for like 5 years literally can't stay up anymore. I had to buy new pants!
I'd say the takeaway is that outside factors can influence us and our performance. But I think its important to find the reason to do things for yourself (and what works for you.) I think if my weight loss had been simply motivated by something as superficial as "Ugh I'm so mad at her!" I wouldn't had stopped after that sushi... Celebrate the successes. Be strict on yourself but also congratulate yourself on the lbs lost. I won't lie to you and tell you there weren't times I thought, "Well I'm 245lbs now and that's only ten pounds less..." with some element of disappointment. But time will march on. You can be ten pounds less in two months or two years but you'll still reach that time all the same. Take the steps.
Edit; great. Miscalculated. It was actually 55lbs not 65. Whoops
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