Hello long-time lurker here, first Reddit post ever! I have been trying to lose weight from when I was ten to now (twenty-one) I was never overweight but due to society's standards, body image issues, and just being a teenaged girl I was always chasing that elusive weight loss. However, being at college, surrounded by cheap good food and alcohol, I haven't had that much luck in that department. Once getting sent home because of corona back in March of 2020, the first thing I did was weigh myself after a week-long binge of drinking, partying, and eating. I was 149.6 pounds. Again I wasn't overweight by any means, but when I came home from college freshman year I weighed 151 after being 138-142 throughout high school. I promised myself that summer as I lost my freshman 10, I would not come close to 150 again. That 149.6 pounds terrified me, how close I was to breaking that promise. So I got to work, I worked out twice a day, going on long runs (I ran XC in HS) and walks. I still did not eat as well as I should of, but I was able to slowly work my way back down to 140 which I was incredibly proud of. I got to 140 around May 2020 and was able to maintain until July 2020. Until I gained half of it back in about two months...
When reaching my goal of 140 I got careless again, and let myself revert back to my old ways, where I would overeat and then overexercise to try to work off the thousands of calories. So again, beginning of my junior year of college, I was back where I started, a few pounds lighter ~145 (September 2020) but still feeling constantly bloated, insecure, and just not feeling good. I didn't think I looked my best either, but my real motivation for losing weight was just how horrible I felt 24/7. I downloaded myfitnesspal and stuck to a diet of 1300-1700 calories a day. If I went over, seeing the red calories on the app was terrible for my mental health so I made my limit extremely high, so I wouldn't feel guilty if I ate over the limit I gave myself. Tracking my calories, practicing self-love, and giving myself patience, was what finally worked for me. From September 2020 to roughly February 2021 I went from 145 to 127/130. I maintained that from February to July 2021. However, after my parents moved to a different state in an entirely different part of the country, I began to emotionally eat and would engage in these massive binges combated with periods of undereating and overexercising to maintain my weight. Despite these efforts, I still gained roughly 2-5 pounds.
This horrible cycle continued throughout the month of July until I couldn't take it anymore and on July 25th I told myself I would no longer care about my weight, I would only focus on stop binge eating. I downloaded the apps Last and Done, to track my progress of not binging and could see the habit being formed. I have not binged or overate until today, where I completely overate at breakfast, I had about five Dunkin donuts frosted donuts. I understand this may constitute a binge for some people, but in my periods of binging if I did that, I would just spend the entire day eating, feeling completely out of control, and piling on an extra 10,000 calories. However, instead today I stopped myself, and I recognized if I continued I would trigger a binge. I feel uncomfortably full, but not sick, and most importantly I am not angry or ashamed of myself for overeating. Again this may seem silly to some people, and I not happy I overate don't get me wrong lol. But I feel like learning how to overeat without binging is a great step to ending my binging. Sorry for the completely long rant just wanted to share this with all of you because this sub has helped my weight loss so much. Also since stopping binging I've gone back to 130 without focusing on weight loss. Also, I am 5' 7'' if that matters at all, and I've been almost two weeks binge free!!!
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/3AjU8an
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