This is part of a larger sermon of loving ones enemy, of which I quote in relevant part:
A second thing that an individual must do in seeking to love his enemy is to discover the element of good in his enemy, and every time you begin to hate that person and think of hating that person, realize that there is some good there and look at those good points which will over-balance the bad points. I’ve said to you on many occasions that each of us is something of a schizophrenic personality. We’re split up and divided against ourselves. And there is something of a civil war going on within all of our lives. There is a recalcitrant South of our soul revolting against the North of our soul. And there is this continual struggle within the very structure of every individual life. There is something within all of us that causes us to cry out with Ovid, the Latin poet, “I see and approve the better things of life, but the evil things I do.”4 There is something within all of us that causes us to cry out with Plato that the human personality is like a charioteer with two headstrong horses, each wanting to go in different directions.5 There is something within each of us that causes us to cry out with Goethe, “There is enough stuff in me to make both a gentleman and a rogue.” There is something within each of us that causes us to cry out with Apostle Paul: “I see and approve the better things of life, but the evil things I do.” 6
So somehow the “isness” of our present nature is out of harmony with the eternal "oughtness" that forever confronts us. And this simply means this: That within the best of us, there is some evil, and within the worst of us, there is some good. When we come to see this, we take a different attitude toward individuals.
While MLK was using our struggle within as an example of our outward struggle as people and communities, I think it's good for /r/loseit to appreciate the struggle within.
We often have observed our behavior being misaligned with our intentions. We find ourselves back in the habit of eating ice cream nightly despite still intending to eat better to lose weight. We are confronted with the “isness” of our present nature is out of harmony with the eternal "oughtness" as MLK put it. The two horses -- steady reason and flashes of emotion -- pulling our chariot in two directions.
Even in procrastinating the start of our weight loss effort, we get confused and wonder how we can ever succeed because we have -- for years -- watched our own counterproductive behavior like we are a powerless spectator of it.
I'll stay with the inner and outer metaphor but now reverse it a bit. As MLK was using the inner to describe the outer, I want to use the outer struggle to talk about the inner struggle.
One thing that has helped me was to embrace my inner child instead of hating him. I see him as a child is; emotional, impulsive and rash, loving and lovable, and sometimes effusive and stormy. He puts the joy in holidays. He's the part of me that likes to sing and wants everyone to have a fun time. I am raising this child but I don't want him to lose those wonderful parts of him. The goal isn't to kill what he is, but to give him more mastery over his reactions to his emotions -- to learn how to deal with frustration, to manage strong desires, to not react when his feelings are injured, to not use food to buffer harsh impressions or to stimulate himself when he's bored.
It's been 7 years so far and I'm still not done. My maintenance is going fine, but it's work. Parents don't stop raising children when they reach 7; and my inner child is similarly doing better than he was but still has a lot of promise ahead. I've succeeded not by hating him, but by loving him.
If hate tears apart communities and nations, think about what it does within the two parts of ourselves.
Love is the way.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2WcBVNx
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