Fair warning, this is more so a rant than anything else and a reminder to not obsess over your food, mindful eating is key! If anything I hope you can learn from my mistakes and where I've driven myself to mentally because of my weight loss goals. I've been overweight for ages. I'm 22 year old female and distinctly remember starting to put on the pounds when I started taking a hypothyroid medication at 8 years old. I don't think I've dropped out of the "overweight" zone since then. Thankfully, 3 years ago I was able to drop down from 155 lbs. to 133 lbs. and have stayed there since, which don't get me wrong, it's great that I haven't gained the weight back, but I'm definitely not pleased with my body and do have a lot of the negative self talk going on because of it. I have wanted nothing more than to lose the last 15-20 pounds I need to drop, but have struggled to do so. My desire to lose the weight is so strong that I've begun feeling guilty anytime I exceed 1200 calories. Initially I thought this would keep me in check and I wasn't concerned, however now I've started to feel nausea and the desire to vomit after eating even though I know it's necessary to fuel my body. I have been having difficulty with losing the weight, but never did I think my goal weight would drive me to the point of such an unhealthy relationship with food. It's very sad to think every time I consume, all I can think about it how I have to go workout after to burn it off or am thinking purely of the calories instead of just enjoying the moment. I hardly exceed 1500 calories and I do feed my body enough and have not yet given in to the devil voice in my head, nor do I plan to, but I have a fear of falling down this rabbit hole to bulimia. I now not only have to fight the guilt and stave off the desire to lose weight until I get back to having a decent relationship with food, but now I'm fighting my own disappointment with myself for obsessing over my weight and caloric intake to this point.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2SqAoPi
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