So the past few months have sucked for everyone, for obvious reasons. I'm lucky and privileged enough that the area of my life most affected by the pandemic so far is weight loss. What with the stress and staying at home, I've undone all the progress I made pre-lockdown - not only physically, but mentally. Although from around January I developed some positive behaviours and habits, I feel like I have to relearn them all again now. I have no idea how to control my eating habits anymore. I've been making half-hearted attempts to keep up with CICO using MFP, but have developed a habit of tracking until the goal calories are met, and then just keep eating without acknowledging those extra cals. My skin is awful, I'm eating less fruit and veg than I ever have, self-esteem is maybe one or two levels away from rock bottom; overall, my outer appearance is just really starting to reflect my inner self, if that doesn't sound too pretentious and wafty.
I've started going for more walks recently, and that's been nice. But I've also started to overeat in compensation for the calories burnt, which I used to be pretty good at avoiding. Think this restart from ground zero will involve as much work on mental health as physical, and it'll be tough. I'm pretty much just feeling that odd fear that this is it now, I'm just going to keep gaining weight and hating myself forever, so there's no point trying. But intellectually I know it is worth the effort, I've managed it before, and it's just a case of starting. I want to feel proud of myself again.
So the plan is to start food tracking again, but focus on nutrition as well as just calories - and track every calorie, even if I feel ashamed by the result. Learn to confront this reality again in a positive way. Eat more high-volume fresh stuff, cut down sugar and oil, and try to be kinder to myself. There are more important things going on in the world at the moment than my health, but that doesn't mean I should just give up completely. And every day is a chance to improve on the day before; today walked so that tomorrow could run!
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/3kcFavJ
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