I don't know where else to post this really, I love this community and it's helped me take my life back.
I went from 245 to 172 (as of yesterday morning) and I need to step back. 2 months ago I was more confident than I've ever been, I was living in the moment, I felt beautiful. But I've been focusing too much of my time and energy on weight loss.
TW; disordered eating
Some not-so-hot things have happened in my personal life and I'm scared of the road I'm going down. I eat way too few calories each day. From 200-600 max. I know it's unhealthy and damaging, I don't know why I can't help it. I don't want to go into it here because this isn't the place. I feel like I'm fighting myself right now and I'm holding onto this little ledge, I'm worried if I let go I'm going to fully dive into my unhealthy urges. I still hope to hit my goal weight one day but I want it to be a healthy weight. I try browsing and I try posting but it feels like I'm posting about the body of somebody else and makes me sick.
Thank you to this subreddit for giving me the tools I needed and the showing me courage that I didn't know I had inside of me. I just need to log off for a few weeks. Or months. I don't know. Somehow I feel like I'm failing you all. I feel like I was so close to being a success story and I fucked it up. I'm hoping I can come back and get back into hyping up people in comments and being inspired by their journey, sharing my stories and helping others get healthy bodies.
Have a nice day everyone, hope to see your lovely usernames again :) <3
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2Xl0O72
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