Here we go again... and I am so very, very tired.

This will probably be long, so my apologies in advance.

A lot of other people saw great success in 2020. I had... rather the opposite happen.

Before COVID, I had set up a solid gym routine. My calories were under control. And I was able to tie this all in with my professional, in-office job. Wake up, head to the gym, shower, go to work, and then feel guilt free when I got to home home and relax at night, with everything exactly where it needed to be. I had hit 203 pounds and was looking forward to being in onederland.

Then COVID hit, and I got laid off. Everything went out the window. A small circus of events happened, and I am now living in a new state, with a terrible job that is also remote and which works me crazy hours every day. My weight is back up to 243.8. I do not have time to go to the gym without stressing myself beyond the limits that I can stand. And I hate it.

I have no issues getting my eating back on track. I'm very active on the weekends, which are my only real downtime. My problem is that, when I hit a bump in the road that makes it impossible for me to keep my food on track, it derails me completely. Add in the fact that I have health issues and get to take a lot of medication that can also make the struggle worse, and I'm having a hell of a time.

This time, I'm going to try a few different things. I had set up an Excel workbook to track every damn thing (calories, weight loss patterns, measurements, workouts) and I now wonder if that was only adding to my stress, so for at least the next month, I am just going to track calories and weight. I've signed up for WW, as well, which may or may not help. And I'll start using this sub again. Most of the reason I left is because there were a lot of posts about wildly unhealthy habits that were... dangerous, depressing, and not helping me with what I need, which is support, community, and people who get that being healthy is about more than just the food, it's about the people around you and taking care of all of you, as well.

The next bump in the road that I have coming up is relatives visiting at the end of July. Let's see if I can make it until then, at least.

This is a ramble and a vent, but I'm hoping it will help me start things off right this time and stick with it.

submitted by /u/FictionallySpeaking
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