I've been learning about weightloss for over a year on reddit, youtube, and general internet searching. I have been intermittently (I tracked daily for 6 months last year but stopped around the holidays) tracking my food and trying to be more active, but I haven't been successful at losing weight because I cannot stick to a reasonable number of calories per day. I started off at 1650 calories/day which was difficult to stick to. Generally I did well Monday thru Thursday, then promptly fell off the wagon Friday night until Monday morning. Rinse and repeat. Still haven't figured that one out. I'm an emotional eater and I binge eat, I have terrible coping skills of using weed/alcohol/food to deal with stress and other problems in my life. After the holidays I tried again, but I haven't been able to stick to a restricted calorie diet since last year. I tried bumping my calories to 1850 (which is approximately how many someone at my goal weight of 155 would eat to maintain their weight) but I keep going over that too. I am at the point now where I feel hopeless because I am trying to do this the right way but it feels impossible. I've never spent this much time focused on anything and still been a failure, just isn't how things go for me, usually.
I try to pick low calorie dense foods, but I'm still hungry all the time it seems. I hate being hungry, I can't focus on my work, I shake, I get nauseous, it's awful. I am hypothyroid and was retested recently, my numbers were in the normal range but my thyroid hormones have steadily declined for the last 3 years so I'm wondering if that could be contributing? I went to my doctor to talk about weight loss and they gave me a printout of the food pyramid and a list of apps like MyFitnessPal which I'm already using... That was a huge disappointment. I'm also in therapy but it hasn't really helped yet with sticking to my plan. My therapist just wants me to get back in the habit of tracking food but it feels pointless if I'm going over everyday despite my best efforts. I can't even picture a life of only eating 1800 calories day/on average. It doesn't seem sustainable. It's so much work to manage too.
I don't really know why I'm posting this but I just figured I should put my thoughts out there and see if anyone else has struggled with this and maybe has some advice.
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