Okay, I shouldn’t say I keep on messing up, because that’s not entirely true... I am very strict majority of the time... I am doing an unintentional intermittent fast- I say unintentional, because I naturally eat my first meal late into the day (1-2pm) and have my last meal around 6-7pm. This is going great for me, and I don’t even suffer from night time cravings (I used to be a big night time eater). Besides the IF, I have done a big calorie cut (from around 4,000-4,500/day to just 1,500-2,000) and honestly feel great. I will incorporate a light cheat meal once a week. But... recently I restarted an old friendship which sees me going to a very close friends house at least one evening a week, and his mom relentlessly pushes foods she knows I love on me. I repeatedly told her I’m fasting, and she knows I’m on a big weight loss journey, but she justifies it by saying “it’s just a little something”, “it’s small”, “it’s good for you after your training”, etc. In their culture it’s seen as very rude to A) not offer your guest anything, and B) for the guest not to accept... so it puts me in this awkward situation. The food is delicious (middle eastern)- she knows I love it- and definitely far from the worst food I could be consuming, but it’s less about the actual food and more about it breaking my fast. Ditto some social occasions I’ve had to attend which were exclusively based around eating (i.e. birthday dinners).... I was off to such a great and strict start, not really hanging around people much at first, but the past few weeks seemed to have event after event, and I just feel like all the rest of the very hard work I’m putting in (intense boxing workouts 3-4 x a week, 1.5/2 hr sessions) + the clean eating is all going to waste when I have these lapses. I know it’s entirely in my control, but it also feels like it’s not, and I just come away so incredibly disappointed each time. I took up boxing almost two months ago and am down 36 pounds, but because of all these lapses, the weight stopped going down as quickly, and at times piling back on... my starting weight was 476 and I was down to 438, but this morning was 441 and will likely be close to 445 tomorrow. And I know it’s a horrible habit to habitually check the number and obsess over it... and I don’t let it get me down, I know weight fluctuates... I just get disappointed in myself for giving in. I’ve worked so hard these past two months and continue to daily, but if I keep “relapsing”, it’ll all be for nothing, and I simply cannot bare that idea. Do I just stop being social completely and cut everyone off? So much of our social interactions are based around food.
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