Tuesday, November 26, 2019

"Why don't you just exercise and diet if you're unhappy with your weight?"

is one of the questions that infuriate me after starting this weight loss journey. It's a valid question but it is filled with such insights into that person's concept of "fat people" and their own journey into their weight, never really understanding the struggle of being fat (overweight/obese) for a prolonged time or most of your life.

I think a lot of people like to think because you're fat - it's because you're a) lazy or b) ignorant - and although that may be a factor to how you might be, it's never really just why you are fat.

What most people who do think like that fail to realise that other issues such as:

  • your upbringing (your family's lifestyle, eating habits, whether they supported your extracurricular activities)

anecdotally, when I was younger til I was 15, my parents never really supported my extracurricular activities - there was no reward for doing my best because my parents never really valued exercise or healthy diets until they lost weight themselves. My parents also fed me "wrong" - we had desserts every day and we had a lot of large meal portions. My parents never really forced me to continue to go to sports - at some point, I played football, I even did dancing - my parents had full time jobs and could never really find an opportunity to support me by being physically present. I know it sounds really pedantic and pathetic but I was a kid, I didn't even know I was actually fat til I was 15.

  • your own mental health - maybe in response to your upbringing or just negative forces around you (binge eating, ana etc)

anecdotally, I've realised that truly from this subreddit and the mukbang community, that those days where I would continually eat til I felt sick, stuffing large amounts of food could be categorised as binges. It honestly weirds me out thinking about in our modern media e.g chick flick films, how normalised it is to eat for comfort e.g typically girl is broken up with and eats a shit ton of ice cream.

  • your health conditions (thyroid issues, issues caused by obesity e.g difficulty to walk)

anecdotally, I have pcos but it's not too much of an issue right now. I have a friend who has thyroid issues and has to lose weight very slowly because of other issues such a bad immune system.

  • what you've done before meeting them (whether you've actually lost weight but you're still fat, or you've tried so many times that you lack motivation, often linking to mental health)

This reason is more of the assumption that if you call yourself fat and are unhappy, then obviously you're doing nothing - you never know what someone's been through to lead you to this point and you don't know whether they are already trying their best at losing weight. This is just a huge pet peeve of mine - especially when someone tries to top it off with a "well, I don't think you're fat" - it means well but it means nothing - you are the master of your own body and you deserve to love your body even if someone else already does.

Sorry the rant sort of died down. But the whole thing is very patronising.

submitted by /u/hatt730
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2KVxoWR

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