If your partner is struggling with weight loss, when is it time to be blunt with them and when should you let them figure it out for themselves?

So.

Since my and my partner have started dating, I've gone from a little overweight to right in the middle of the healthy range (BMI wise), and plan on losing about ten more pounds. He's a little overweight and has stayed that way since the beginning. I think he's sexy as hell, so this isn't about that, but I know he's unhappy about his weight because he's told me and he has some issues with energy that I suspect would get better with some weight loss.

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He's the kind of guy who used to be able to stay fit without much effort, but now he has an office job and isn't so active and is finding weight loss a little more challenging. He's been trying different things since before we were dating but nothing has worked. None of the things he's tried have been tracking CICO.

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He knows I count calories because I'm open about it and he sees me measuring things, and I think it's rubbing off on him - he's starting to pay attention to labels and ask about calorie content in things I cook. However, he is SUPER resistant to the idea of actually tracking things. I've brought it up once or twice when he's talked about how frustrated he is that his weight isn't dropping, and he's quick to shut it down with "that doesn't work for me" or "I just want to focus on making healthier choices". Fine, you know, his body, his life.

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But I think he really doesn't understand how much he's eating, and I don't know if it's my place to point it out. Yesterday he came home and at dinner time was like "I can't believe I'm not that hungry, I've barely eaten today." I asked him what he'd eaten, and it was toast (and his idea of toast is serious) and a donut and lunch at a restaurant. Like... that's a fair amount of food to have eaten by dinnertime. That is really far from "barely eaten".

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I think tracking would be a huge eye opener for him, and I hate seeing him so frustrated when his weight stays the same week after week. But I also don't know if it's my place to try and set him straight and if I should just let him figure it out from my example (or not). He knows what I do, he's watched it work, part of me thinks it's just up to him if he decides to make that choice or not, but part of me thinks maybe I should talk to him about it?

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For those of you with partners who struggle with their weight, how do you handle it? Do you try and make them more aware of their habits or do you consider it their business?

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