Advices on my journey that is more like a path to purgatory

Hello, (I 23M) would like some advices / your point of view on my "journey" in weight loss.

Just to give a quick context : As far as I can remember I have always been the kind to like food and to be overweight (not obese but overweight) but then with the stress at the university it became more severe and I was prone to "bulimia phases" where i was shopping for a lot of food, eating the most i could and then throwing in the trash the left-overs.

Then i started my journey, i lost around 50 pounds in 3 months (yeah it was an extreme diet + everyday sport), got them back after one year and you can repeat that for 3 years but always while trying to "easy down" the extreme diet (meaning not being too rude on myself)

Now i'm doing CICO since it is easier for me to not be stressed about the diet and i'm not doing sport. I'm doing one cheat meal per week but after the cheat meal I gain like 3/4 pounds this is insane and it goes away after one week but still this is worrying me and i feel like shit everyday and not feeling that i'm losing weight.

To resume a little bit where I would like some advices :

1. I tried 3 diets and lost 50+ pounds each time and got them all back (on 3 years)
2. Now i'm tired and exhausted all day long, I have motivation for mostly nothing (for work it is still ok)
3. Food is like a drug for me, if i'm away from it for a sufficient time the desire will go away but once I taste some fast food etc the desire is coming back and it is irresistible to transform the cheat meal into a cheat day / week
4. The amount of energy I have to put to restrict myself is insane when I want to eat some "bad food"
5. When I eat my cheat meal with someone (not alone) i'm not feeling the same "pleasure" than I would eating it alone
6. I'm trying to keep my cheat meal for a lunch with friends / family / GF because I feel like always saying (I can't i'm doing a diet) is annoying.
7. I saw a psychologist for a while and it helped, but not as much as I thought.

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