as someone who's never been active a day in their life and can't choose their food....how do i ease into things? is there even any hope for me? ;n;

i'm sorry if i'm breaking any rules by making a "what do i do" post... i'm sure theres millions of these but i figured i'd be typing too much to put in the q&a thread.

backstory: i've been depressed my entire life. i've always hated my body and everything about it. (F, 5'3, 170 as of a year and some change ago) just seeing things about weight loss would trigger my depression and self hatred so i couldnt even think about trying to get better. and even if it didnt, i wouldn't have enough energy or motivation to do anything anyway.

i'm doing better now. depression has risen a bit since quarantine started but my self imagi e has improved a lot the past year. getting a boyfriend helped a lot. he loves my chubby body.

while he likes my body which has done wonders for my self image, and i kinda like being a little squishy and find it cute, i still want to lose a little bit. not all of it, i just dont want a belly that protrudes this much. now that I like myself a little more i can safely say that i want to do this for myself, and not as a desperate attempt to get people to like me.

i have 2 problems though

1. i live with my parents. we're pretty poor and my parents tend to buy a lot of cheap food. it's not really unhealthy a lot of the time, but it's not 100% healthy all the time either. think of it like a broke college kid diet. i dont really have a say in what i eat for dinner because they're in charge. i can cut out snacks and for the most part pick my breakfast and lunch (if theres even anything i can make with what we have) so food is going to be an issue. i will try my best with what i have though.

2. i've never been active. ever. I was always too terrified of people seeing my exercise, and honestly i still kind of am. the most i've ever done is walk a couple of km to play pokemon go lol.... i havent run since high school gym class, or done anything active of the sort either. its embarrassing. but a bunch of mental health issues and crippling anxiety will do that haha. the point is, even the smallest things will strain me cause my body isnt used to it and i dont know how to ease into things.

is there like...any hope for me? what can i do in the safety of my bedroom? i'm still nervous about people seeing my exercise so i dont know if i can go out and run. i probably wouldnt get very far anyway without feeling like i cant breathe. i just have no idea where to start. theres too many websites and forums and sources about losing weight and I'm so overwhelmed... (a lot which i assume arent right or safe... i kept getting recommended intermittent fasting but it seemed to close to an eating disorder for me to be comfortable with)

again i'm sorry if i'm breaking any rules and i'll delete the post right away. i'm just very overwhelmed and i don't know where to start.

edit: ah apparently diet is like 80% of the journey and i dont have control over that so i guess i'm stuck :(

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