Down 31 pounds this year and I've learned so much about my body and my relationship with food. Here's some things that's been on my mind that I hope helps others :)

1. I don't need or want to partake in fad diets because food isn't "bad" or "good". It's just food. This one is a big one and directly contributes to my success. I found that if I limit myself to the things that I can or can't have, I not only am teaching myself poor eating habits but I am also far more likely to binge on the things I miss when I do put them back in my diet. I eat food now to gain, lose, or maintain the weight I want with zero restrictions outside of whatever my weekly caloric goal is. I work full time, go to school full time, and raise my children. Worrying about if I'll have access to the food I'm "allowed" for my diet, or making sure to meal prep with ingredients I never seem to have is not something I have time for. Also there's nothing more embarrassing for me then telling a host/friend/ family member that I can't eat something specifically against my diet. Now I just eat less if I know it's extremely calorie dense (looking at you pizza). The folks over at r/CICO have been instrumental in assisting me with this journey so thank you guys!

2. Cheat days taught me to treat food as a reward for not eating it and nothing more. I identified that using food as a means to reward myself made food far too important to me. Now I no longer have cheat days. I always eat what I want and adjust accordingly. If I know I'll be going to a birthday party and will be having beers or calorie dense foods like pizza, I make sure to not eat up all my calories that morning. It's much better to say "I'll skip the donut/bagel and just do coffee and a light lunch".

3. I HAD to change my mindset about food. Dieting isn't about shedding the weight and popping back to your old lifestyle. For some reason I subconsciously thought that all would be fine after I lost the weight. WRONG. Yo yo dieting galore. Couldn't get under 200lbs to save my life. The one time I did I maintained for under a week at 199. Now I understand the importance of "eating things in moderation". I now know that expecting to go back to my lifestyle of eating and drinking everything without thought is long gone if I want to be at my ideal weight. I knew this time I had to change my mindset about food and not jump into #1 on this list. I had to remind myself that just because someone was super successful with their weight loss by only eating my favorite things (bacon and butter) doesn't mean I had to do it as well to see the same success.

4. I realized It's okay to take a break from dieting. Nobody said you had to maintain a caloric deficit (which is really the foundation of all weight loss) all the way until your goal weight is achieved. I've taken multiple breaks where I've increased my caloric intake to maintenance level because I knew that week was a couple of fun events, or more recently big "eating" holidays. I remind myself that this is a lifestyle change and not just a diet. I'll be easily back over 200 again if I think I can't handle coming off it for a week or two, not to mention never being able to maintain my ideal body weight. I'm happy to say that I really enjoyed Thanksgiving and didn't say no to a single dish or drink that day:)

5. I didn't need to have a $50 gym membership I never had or wanted to make time for to reach the goal weight I wanted to be. Now I'm not saying there is no reason to workout...no no no. I'm saying that my particular weight loss journey is not about setting goals for flexibility or strength. It's about hitting that specific number on the scale (175btw!:)). For a long time I convinced myself that I could never be the weight I wanted to be because there's no way I'd find myself working out 3-4 days a week, all while meal prepping foods found only in cavemen days (sorry that was the fad diet flavor of the week when I thought about the gym and failed meeting my weight loss goal shortly after joining). I realized that there were plenty of lean people at the weight I wanted who hadn't worked out in years! I now realize how silly I was to think the only lean/thin people were ones who worked out. Pro Tip: On the flipside...You will lose weight more quickly and/or may increase the amount of food you get to eat if you do choose to workout alongside the added health benefits!

6. Similar to number 5 I learned to not do too much at once. Every pound I lost was me making a single better decision than the alternative. Someone in another sub I can't remember said it perfectly when they said you gotta take the "ands" out of your food choices. Enjoy a beast of a burger! Just not a burger, AND a fry, AND a shake. Have yourself some delicious pasta! Just not pasta AND some garlic bread AND that wonderful cheesecake. It's absolutely okay to take things a little slower.

7. The final and most important lesson I've learned (I have more but this is already too long sorry) is to do it for me and nobody else. This time I didn't start my diet with a friend for "moral support". This time I didn't make a loud announcement regarding my diet plan (you should see the people you work with everyday try to figure out what the heck is different about you and that moment it hits them haha) to all of my friends and family to "hold myself accountable". This time I didn't go in with the plan that all I have to endure is "drinking two meal replacement shakes, eating a low carb dinner, and making sure I took all of my weight loss supplements within a specific time frame each and everyday" to achieve my goal. And this time (the one good AND mind you;)) I didn't wait for some trivial date just because this month "has too much going on", or " it's the holiday season"....because guess what!? I know that every month has something going on. I'm a parent! I'm a student! I'm a staff member! I'm not here to meet my goal weight and return to my starting point. These things will be here year after year and I will continue to remind myself that life and the growing pangs associated with change will always, always, ALWAYS! be difficult, and that tomorrow is never guaranteed. But hey... when tomorrow does come...I'll be at least a little more comfortable in my skin;) Thanks for reading!

Tl;dr- It's not about saying yes or no to "good food" or "bad food". It's about changing your entire mindset. It's about remembering why you're doing what you're doing, and asking yourself what you will do differently than last time after your goal is reached.

submitted by /u/DasIronGoat
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