TW: Suicidal thoughts
I'll introduce myself. I'm a 5 foot 6 male, approx 360lbs, age 25. I'm obviously very overweight and well aware of this. I have previously been able to get down to 199lbs but anxiety and PTSD from attending the concert where the Manchester Arena terrorist attack happened has made my weight skyrocket, especially from being on anti-depressants.
I live on a council estate, many many residents crammed in a small area with most of these residents not being the most friendly of bunch (drug dealers, thieves, ex cons etc.). I have been taunted on my weight by other residents many years ago but it has not happened for a very long time.
I've spent months building myself to start losing weight again, it is a big step mentally for me. I've only been 1 week on calorie counting, weighed myself yesterday and was happy with myself after a 3lb weight loss and left to get myself a cheat meal (this is how I've successfully lost weight in the past by allowing one cheat meal a week). As soon as I left, I just had a gut feeling something bad was going to happen when I came back, I don't know how I was able to predict it but it happened. I arrive back, didn't even get a chance to close my car door before someone started hurling weight insults at me out of their apartment window. I felt absolutely humiliated, these insults would've been audible to 100+ other residents. I didn't acknowledge them cos I didn't want them to have the satisfaction hurting me, so I ignored their insults for the next 30 seconds whilst I made it to my front door as if I heard nothing. As soon as I got into my flat I basically had a breakdown, I had an especially bad day yesterday on top of already bad mental health issues so I wouldn't be lying if I said I had suicidal thoughts for the rest of the night (thankfully I feel I've mostly gotten over it today). Me and my partner are saving for a mortgage and we are very close to reaching the savings we need so moving isn't an option right now.
My question is, to people who have suffered similar unprovoked abuse from strangers in the past - how have you coped?
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