Hello whoever might read this! I apologize for the lenght of this upcoming text.
I will use the metric measurements in this post, in case you guys were wondering!
The point with this post is to make myself feel more accountable and also open up about myself. I think it would be a fun idea to look back and see how thing have gone along the way, assuming I will make it through this for quite some time. I also know that other's might benefit from reading this just as I have been motivated from reading you guys' stories :)
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For the past 5 years have I been overweight and obese. I am 23 years old, 172 cm tall (5.6 feed according to google) and weigh 106.8 kg (235 lbs) as of today.
The causes of this unfortunate state is my continuous bad lifestyle choices. 5 years ago I discovered I had money that could be used for unhealthy foods and thus began my binge eating. I went from 65 kg to 75 during my last year of high (?) school. After that I continued further down that path and am now the weight of miserable (aka. the weight stated "as of today"). Even though I've always liked my own looks and body, I am now very ashamed of the amount of fat glued to my bones. I personally don't have anything against people with more fat on their body but I myself am not content with this health issue.
Like so many others I've been all pumped up and excited to FINALLY lose weight. It will all start with me watching a weight loss video on youtube, decide on the nearest monday / 1st of the month / 1st of the year etc.. I last an hour or two, after that I give up and decide I'm destined for bad health. I am weak and I know it. It doesn't matter how many times I've tried, I just never try my best. This time it feels different though. I feel rather good about it but not in the "OMG I AM GOING TO LOSE WEIGHT SO FAST" way. I think this might be a proper shot at getting somewhere, I won't leave it all to chance either. I am determined to make it last.
Most of my motivation comes from the guy I am in love with (Euh... typical). We have talked online for the past year and he really wants to meet me. I, of course, want to meet him too but my shame for my body fat is pulling me away. I have been very insecure and lied about my weight. I have told him I am chubby and I constantly hint at how unhealthy I am but I just don't want to make myself properly say my weight. I feel awful for lying to him, but I would feel even more awful being content with how I look right now. I want to be more healthy and happy when I meet him, not get dragged down by my own misery and shame. This is why I want to change.
I know it isn't the best idea to change yourself because of another person, let alone someone I am currently head over heels for.. but what the heck. I am REALLY unhealthy and may bring any kind of disaster onto my body whenever and wherever. I might as well milk this desire for what it is worth. At least I'll have a chance of getting somewhere.
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This morning I woke up with a rather unusual change in attitude. I was more concerned of my health and I decided to make choices based on this new way of thinking. Therefore, I spent the day eat less, eating more natural as in "clean" vegetables, meat, dairy etc. By "clean" I mean not altered. I've been pleasantly surprised by my devotion to this. It has only been a day but I hope I can keep it going from here on.
I promised to meet the guy I am in love with sometime between late april - early may and that's what I am going to try and do! It doesn't matter if I won't be the "perfect" me (becuase let's face it, who the hell can healthily lose 35 kg in 1-3 months?). I am going to try and make the best of this situation and do as well as I can. I would like to become a bit (or a lot) slimmer until then, along with adding good habits and a better mood. I think I have potential to improve greatly :)
Now, do any of you (that hopefully made it through this post) have any suggestions as to how to achieve maximize my potential?
My goals so far is to continue to eat clean as long as possible, trying to cut down on carbs (not completely). I know a lot of people don't suggest this method but it has worked on my body before and I want to give it a go. I will also try and add more walks into my lifestyle. I am not a gym person so there is also that... My goal weight is about 70 kg but up until meeting I would like to try and lose 10 kg. I think it might be rather easy as I must have a ton of "temporary weight" such as the weekends binge foods and overall water weight.
Thank you if you've read so far! I appreciate it and hope you have a wonderful day! :) Let us all do our best and become new and healthier versions of our current selves.
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