Thursday, February 28, 2019

Feeling confused...

I found this small gym run by a fitness couple last year that really made me feel welcomed to their small family of people who love functional fitness. It was a great encouraging atmosphere where everyone was extremely friendly and supportive of me when I started (extremely obese). Unfortunately I was injured a couple months ago and was unable to continue exercising there for a while. However, during that time I would stay in touch via text messages and even popped in once to just say “hi” to the people I started to see as my friends/family and mentors.

During this injury period away I could not do much more than walk or very lightly jog (which I did every day), so I paid very care attention to eat super clean to make sure I could continue my weight loss in the only way I had available. My body’s shape has finally started changing over the last few weeks and I was feeling confident wearing normal sized t-shirts (that actually fit me) FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE THAT I CAN REMEMBER...

I visited the gym today wearing a normal t-shirt that actually fits me and everyone I knew did double-takes like they didn’t recognize me at first and then some of them looked at me like they were almost disgusted. A couple of them said “wow you’re really skinny” and my main mentor even said “man you’ve lost a lot of muscle since you’ve been away.”

I know people can’t read my mind, that a formerly super obese 275lbs guy is finally confident enough to wear a shirt that isn’t a few sizes too big on him, but man I was expecting people to be more encouraging or even just casual/apathetic—because blending in to the crowd is actually something I’ve never felt being so aware of my obesity for so long.

Does this make sense? Am I overthinking this? Please help me change my mindset so I don’t feel so depressed. Something in everyone’s faces changed when they saw me today in a weird way. Not like a “wow our training partner is at a normal weight after dedicating so much time and effort” but to me it felt like they were looking at me with concern or even disgust. My lab results came back from the doctor last week and every test/indicator says I’m super healthy, I’m at a BMI of 24.3. Anyone else have similar experiences?

submitted by /u/Birdieeaglealbatross
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