Tuesday, March 26, 2019

NSV? [Vent] I keep being told to stop losing

F/29/5'5" SW: 252 lbs CW: 161 lbs GW: 140 lbs 1.5 years CICO

I've heard some variation of "geez, how much more are you gonna lose" from multiple people recently. My goal weight is still 21 pounds away, and I chose that number because then I would finally be in the "normal" BMI category for my height. (I plan to reach 145-150, then start maintenance and begin looking into surgeons for skin removal, which will take care of the final 5-10.) I feel like that's a perfectly reasonable goal weight, but it seems that those around me think that I'm going too far.

I want to think that it comes from a good place, and maybe it does for some, but I can't help but feel like some of the people who've said this just don't want me to appear "thin." I've been overweight since I was 7, and obese since I was 16. No one has ever seen me as thin and it almost feels like as I'm shedding that part of my identity, people don't know how to respond to me, so they tell me to stop, as if my weight loss is too much of a change for them to handle.

Last week I went to see a friend and we got to talking about my weight loss and I revealed to her that I'm actually quite unhappy with my (nude) body because of how much loose skin I have, and she said in a very condescending tone "wait, if you hate your body now, why are you still losing weight?" I couldn't make her understand how loose skin works, and that I'm happy with what I look like underneath it, but I won't be able to truly see it until the skin is gone.

I just never thought I'd reach a point where I had to justify my weight loss. The first year had been only positive reactions, and people telling me to "keep up the good work." I did, and I still am. And I don't understand why that's an issue now. Maybe I'm reading too much into all of this, as I have a tendency to do, but maybe not. This journey has been such a mindfuck.

submitted by /u/akceber_nnyl
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