Hi all! I'm F22, 5'4. After a year of dieting in 2019, starting at 160lbs, I was able to drop down to 130lbs by Jan 2020- which was very close to my goal weight. I did mainly CICO along with some weekly bike rides.
I was feeling really good about myself, I had cut back to only drinking a couple times a month and hardly craved anything over my typical 1200/cal daily limit since I lived alone and basically ate the same thing every day (which, though I love cooking new recipes, ended up saving me a lot of time to focus on things other than what I was going to eat for the day.)
Then,, it all changed when I started dating again. I found a man I adored, we moved in together quickly, cooked dinner together every night- everything was fairy tale perfect... except, my diet went to shit. I've been calling it the fresh "man" fifteen.
When I met him he was on keto, and had lost also about 30lbs. He was hot as hell. I could tell we were both in a place of being strict about dieting. He convinced me to do keto, and it was alright, I maintained and stopped counting calories. But we'd binge on booze every single night. I would open my closet where I kept the trash and boxes of Franzia wine would tumble down like a guilty avalanche. Im a heathen when it comes to alcohol- if it's in the house in going to drink it (chug it, even.)
So, long story short, we quit keto, ate a lot of takeout, binged ourselves on alcohol and both gained back roughly 20lbs each. Now, he doesn't seem to mind at all, stating that he'd take those 20lbs on if it meant he could eat junk food again. But I feel,, yucky. I miss my old energetic self. I told him I'm going to start back on the 1200/day journey and he basically told me "Well it obviously isn't going to work, because you gained it all back in a couple of months. You need to be working out and developing muscle instead."
I don't want this to devolve into a 'my bf is being mean' post, but he also said that our dinner of one bowl of homemade green chili and my two glasses of wine (the only thing I've eaten all day) was already 1500/calories, which "proves" 1200/day is unrealistic. Which,, is just plain false given that I know every ingredient that went into it and told him as much so. So I feel that he doesn't understand calories? Or hell, maybe I don't understand. I never know how to counter his arguments because he used to be a personal trainer and is very dead-set on the mentality that working out is mainly what you need to do.
This past week I've been charting everything and sticking to 1500/ish a day. I already feel better. I joined a gym and do plan on running a bit, but that's moreso just to wiggle out my tense back and not to build any sort of muscle.
I guess my long winded question being: is it unreasonable to think I could lose the extra weight I gained back by CICO alone and keep it off? And maybe the second question of how the hell do I curb the influence of this alcoholic, takeout eating man of mine might be better suited for a different subreddit, but any advice would be nice. I just feel so sad that I found something that did work for me, and now not only can I not get the support from my partner to pursue it again, but I have him constantly telling me why it won't be effective and isn't healthy.
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