In June, I met up with a group of family members that I had not seen in a long time. I had already made decent progress on my journey, but I was still obese, and everyone else on this side of the family is thin and fit. I had also just come back from a summer vacation, so I was even bigger than usual. I felt so out of place, and I know they are all the kind of people who are vigilant about their own weight, and immediately catch the problem if they gain a few pounds. I spent the whole time worried they were secretly judging me, which wrecked my self-confidence. They were all happy to see me, and obviously didn’t comment on my weight, but I felt so ashamed, and like an elephant. The hostess took candid pictures, and I looked absolutely awful in one where I was sitting down, with my chair way in front of thin people in the background. I looked awful in all the pictures that day, and felt ashamed to see them.
Yesterday, we got together again! This time, I am just overweight, and have even been losing through thanksgiving and the Christmas season so far! I felt so confident and happy with the progress I’ve made, even at a difficult time to lose weight. I wasn’t focused on feeling like an elephant, and could let loose and have fun. The hostess took candid pictures again, and I was actually happy with how I looked in them, and tagged myself! I didn’t feel intimidated by the great shape everyone else was in, and could be more relaxed and confident. I realized that by the next time I see them, I might even be at my goal weight! It was a night and day difference with how self-conscious I felt last time!
I definitely learned today what people mean when they say, “the confidence that comes from weight loss is amazing!” I’m not even to my goal yet, but the social experience was completely different. I’m so proud of the hard work I have put in, and can’t wait to be at my goal!
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