Tuesday, March 12, 2019

No more PacMan

Hi everyone I'm terrified, Hi terrified, I'm Dad (I love Dad jokes)

So, here goes...

I was a skinny kid, but in my last year of high school I began to gain weight.

I have spent the last 20 years eating when I was depressed and anxious, which has been a lot of the time. When I feel bad I basically become Pac Man, eating my way through shameful feelings.

I have literally ate my feelings, as well as eating instead of saying things I should have said to family members, people at work etc.

I eat to numb out, I eat to comfort myself, I eat when I don't believe in myself, I eat when I compare myself to others and I especially eat when I feel like I am the "ugly friend". I use food to distance myself from others and protect myself.

I want to (but am scared about) eating better because I am tired of getting in my own way with food (and also I do want to feel more confident in my body). I am 30 lbs over what the BMI guide says I should be and I get SO TIRED from eating shitty.

It's weird, because I have open-minded and lovely friends, but I can't talk about possible weight loss around them because they get really mad at me.

I'm not a dick about it. I make sure not to talk about it w people I know have eating disorders, or are in recovery from one. But I am super anxious about this change and want to talk to someone about it.

So, hi!

I'm ZombieSharkRobot and I'm trying to not eat my feelings and treat my body better

submitted by /u/ZombieSharkRobot
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2TMTRLx

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