TLDR: my physician jumped to the conclusion that i was anorexic despite the fact that i have a bmi of 20. the doctors there made rude comments about "my anorexia" and overstepped their boundaries in trying to "help me" despite me showing no signs of an eating disorder.
for context, the doctor's office in my town is crap. there are countless stories i could tell about them falsely diagnosing people with depression (this happened to my brother) and once i was diagnosed with spinal meningitis and almost had to undergo surgery, only to find out last minute that i did not actually have spinal meningitis, and the person working at the office simply had an obsession with this disease. my point is basically that the doctor's office where i live is obsessive about finding issues with people that are not there, ESPECIALLY mental health issues.
i would not say that i have ever been fat, but i gained a lot of weight between 8th grade and 11th grade due to hormonal stress, and was on the verge of becoming overweight (bmi of 24). during quarantine i decided to go on a low calorie diet in order to ensure that i did not gain weight (and to lose weight so i can feel good/perform better in athletics when i go back to school.) i was successful using CICO, as well as exercise to go from 141.5 lbs down to 120.5 lbs. I am 17 years old and 5'4. my parents were very involved in my diet, and i talked a lot about what i was eating, how i was feeling and what my goals were with them. it has been a very safe and healthy experience, and i don't plan on going any lower than 110 (and might decide to move back up if 110 is uncomfortable for me.)
i had a doctor's appointment, but before i visited i had to do a 15 minute check-in via video call with my physician. i decided to tell dr. olivia (fake name), who is a good friend of my mom's and usually a very sweet woman, that i was undergoing weight loss. as soon as i said this, she seemed alarmed. the sudden alarm did not make sense to me, as the last time i had visited i was borderline overweight (bmi of 24), so it would make sense that i would try to drop a few pounds. i told her EXACTLY what i had been doing during quarantine/summer, as well as my goal of reaching 110 lbs (which i stated was an absolute minimum and that i would probably not stay there,) and she said that she was concerned that i might have an eating disorder.
my doctor has the right to be concerned, after all I am a 17 year old girl, and 110 lbs is on the low end of normal for my height. but the way that she handled this situation was absolutely not okay, and if i did have an eating disorder, would have seriously made it worse.
note that although i have plans of reaching 110 lbs, i was 120.5 lbs (20 bmi) when i went to the doctors office.
when i visited her, she immediately began aggressively discussing "my eating disorder" with me--we had not even discussed whether there even was an eating disorder to begin with--and demanded that i either see the exact nutritionist she recommended--a local HAES "healthy eating and movement" group whose slogan was "ditch the scale"--or come into the office once per week for weight checks. my mom jumped in to defend me, stating that both she and my dad were fully aware of what was going on and didn't see any reason to be concerned. my doctor was convinced that I had an eating disorder, despite only having a vague knowledge of my diet and workout habits, and basically said that my behavior was "really concerning" and that i must do exactly what she was asking. she left the room and my physical began with a weigh-in. another doctor came into the room and told me to "take my phone out of my pockets" and then said "get all the rocks and treasures out too" with a laugh. this comment made me uncomfortable, as it shows that the entire office was already convinced that i was anorexic. later, when dr. olivia came back, she measured my heart rate. it is important to understand that i am athletic, and I have always been a frequent runner--I run 2 miles and 4 miles daily on interval. she measured my bpm and my resting heart rate was 47--on the high end for an athlete. she made a face and said "that's very low," then she finished the physical, i received my vaccinations and went home.
dr. olivia told the head doctor at the office that she was concerned that i had an eating disorder, and my family recieved a call stating that i must come in to have blood tests done, as well as some kind of test where they hook me up to a treadmill and measure my heart rate while i am running. my parents refused, and dr. olivia emailed my mom multiple times implying that she is a neglectful parent, and saying that with my heart rate of 47, "it is dangerous for [me] to be running (AT ALL.)" this contrasts with my experiences, as i have been getting increasingly faster times throughout my weight loss. my dad, a fitness expert, was outraged that they were jumping to conclusions and overstepping their boundaries. he told me that a low heart rate like 47 was a good thing when you are athletic, and that it was absurd that they were trying to paint this situation as if i were going to die. my mom asked three of her friends--a personal trainer, a biologist and another fitness expert--who all said the same thing: it is not a concern, and my heart rate is good. my mom wrote to dr. olivia again, asking why she was so concerned, but she did not respond.
my family made the decision to leave this doctor's office for good, and we are now looking for a doctor that has better knowledge of athletes and nutrition. i still have to go back soon for my second round of vaccinations, which will be uncomfortable, but then we will be going somewhere else. i know some people might read this story and be concerned that i have an eating disorder--because of my goal, age, and because the physician said so--but you will just have to take my word that i do not. i know what eating disorders look like because my mom was hospitalized for one when she was younger, and i have had friends who suffer with them too. i love food and i can't wait to reach my goal so that i can increase my calorie intake and eat more of my favorite things. this experience just upset me a lot because i had been really proud of myself for my weight loss, and i had hoped that my doctor would be supportive. she made me question myself, and she made my mom worry and question her own parenting; this was hurtful coming from someone who had been a friend.
i know that dr. olivia likely had genuine concern, however it was also clear that she is heavily influenced by HAES based on the terminology she used throughout this interaction (also because this way of thinking is common where i live), and i think that she was letting her own personal beliefs and values overshadow her position as a doctor. while she might not think CICO and maintaining a healthy BMI are important, i do, and i wish she would not diagnose me with an eating disorder just because i am briefly pursuing these things. watching your weight ≠ having an eating disorder.
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