For starters, I started weight loss way back in April of this year, losing 20~25lbs by the end of summer by calorie counting, walking 6 miles for an hour and a half, then swimming for anywhere between 2 hours and 7 hours. So basically, I was doing good. Until I was sent to my uncles to work. While I was there, i certainly toned in my weight! But didn't lose or gain any, as I was doing labor and needed to eat more. So i went from eating 2500 calories normally to somewhere like 4500 maybe? More.like 3500 probably, I didn't log that much. During this time I went from 260 to about 235 in pounds.
Once back home and in school, I basically flat lined. Because of the winter and school situation, workout cut back a whole lot, to just a quick under an hour walk, so 300~400 calories, I had to go into doing low carb, low fat, low calorie dieting, high Protein, with eating.under 1500 calories a day.
Last week I took the week off from dieting. A mix of too many "cheat days" due to the holidays and a wonky schedule with all of my family home, coupled with an issue in meals due to economic reasons, requiring us to just go with the flow rather than being picky with our meals and what we eat. Plus not working out due to just being busy with family and no space to begin with. I'm at 253lbs again.
I even tried thigh workouts. Toning my body if I couldn't lose weight, I'd at least shape what I have and keep weight off. But not even that shit works.
And now I'm here. At the end of 2020. Just fucking disappointed.
And anytime I ask, all I get is super positive shit that doesn't help, maybe a program that does help, or told to stop bitching by a family member because apperantly they were graced with he eyes of God and can see every minor detail in my face and body that has changed with a pound loss of weight. Told I'm doing good, even though I just looked at the scale and saw I weighed 20 fucking pounds.
Like I just see it as stupid at this point.
My plan to keep weight off during the winter, lose some during the summer, and keep it off in the winter has absolutely failed.
It sucks even more too mentally!!!!
Not just he idea of gaining weight back, but the fact I was finally confident in myself. i was actually buying into he bs that I looked good. The clothes I got for Christmas were the first ones I've gotten and actually looked like who I wanted to be in. My hair is getting better, I no longer look like I haven't showered!
And then I get a kick to the balls with this weight and toning shit.
Edit: another large issue is the thought process of having a routine. It's hard to keep up when I've had to change my routine 3~4 times now because life's a bitch. I get we'll always have to go off track and realign wonky, but holy shit balls is this annoying. It's beyond "eh, it's ok, there's always tommorow!" After i accidentally go a bit over my budget, or I forget to workout.
Hopefully I see how the rest of this and next year goes for guidance, because this is weird.
In my mind, I don't mind strict weight loss during the summer when it's possible, and just having to keep weight off in the winter. That's fine! But when you have to constantly change and adapt to shit it's annoying and makes it feel worthless.
The only thing that hadn't changed is logging food by using my "Lose It!" App. That's it.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/38GOVNH
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