How I Grew (and Shrunk) During 2020 (F5'9" SW 190 CW 143 GW 140-145).

From April to October, I went from 190 pounds to 145. Since then I've been maintaining around 145 very happily. This community was very helpful for me early on in my journey, so I wanted to give back and share some information about my journey, + some concrete takeaways that might be helpful for others. This is not a comprehensive list as I didn't want to make this post too crazy long, but I'm hoping this is inspirational and helpful to anyone else who needs it.

Where I started: I was already somewhat active. My main issues were poor diet, an unhealthy love of sweets, and comfort+boredom eating in large portions. Note that, I was a full-time college student (Mar-May), and then a full-time employee with very solid work-life balance (May-present), so I have a lot less time commitments than others here (e.g. people working several jobs, parents, caretakers). My exercise regimen at times was quite time-intensive, but that was totally unnecessary for weight loss and more for my mental health during a pandemic than anything else. All that to say: don't take all this as gospel as YMMV with these tips. This is just my one journey that I hope can help others.

My Timeline

• Jan-March: I began 2020 wanting to make some healthy lifestyle changes. I started going to the gym 4-5 times/week, and putting screens away an hour before bed to read and stretch instead. As a full-time college student with part-time jobs, this was difficult but once I started doing it, I felt much happier and healthier.
• March: I came home from university because of the pandemic, and spent a week binging Breaking Bad, wine, and junk food with my sibling. I felt like shit and missed the happiness and stability that came from the healthy habits I'd started to develop. I committed to: walking for at least an hour every day (trying to throw in some jogging as well), and eating one serving at each meal + one snack (or treat) every day. This was not directly in a weight loss effort, but just to feel physically better. The walks always lifted my mood and were easy to commit to. The changes to my diet forced me to confront my emotional+boredom eating -- it was difficult and every bit worth it.
• April (189 -> 185): I started doing 16:8 IF (though I didn't know there was a name for it at the time), and 30 Days of Yoga. IF really helped me get back in touch with hunger cues. I picked up this Yoga practice because I missed going to the gym, but with the pandemic, didn't have the enthusiasm to engage in such high-energy body-focused workouts. Yoga felt not only physically but mentally and emotionally beneficial, and I cannot recommend that yoga sequence enough. This is when I started tracking my weight.
• May, June (185 -> 167): I was now working 10am-6pm, the weather was nice, and the pandemic was still in full swing. For exercise: I started power-walking for 30 minutes before work, for 1.5 hours after work, and then doing my daily yoga after that. I didn't calorie count but tried to be calorie conscious (so, having a rough idea + paying attention to when I felt satiated while eating). I switched to eating a big breakfast, a big late lunch, and a dinner snack.
• July, August (166 -> 153): It got too hot out for my morning walks so those only happened once a week. I started dating someone, so I didn't always have time for evening walks or yoga. But I tried to account for this in my food intake, and again listening to my fullness cues.
• Sep, October (151 -> 145): I was interviewing for + negotiating job offers, dealing with deaths of loved ones due to COVID, broke up with my boyfriend, and was feeling quite empty. In September I barely did any workouts (perhaps yoga 1-2x a week), and in October I picked up long walks ~3-4x a week. This was a hard time, but I very rarely comfort ate because I had truly internalized that eating junk would just make me feel worse physically, and wouldn't solve the problem I was dealing with.

For the past month or two, I've been maintaining around 143-147. I picked up jogging (C25K) for early Nov-early Dec, but the windiness has put me off for now. For the past two weeks, I've been back on daily yoga and long walks.

Concluding personal reflections: Ultimately the weight loss (and the conventionally attractive body that has come with it), at the end of all this, has been only one small chunk of my growth. My diet is so much better, and my relationship to my body, mind, and wellness is so much better. Walks and yoga help me have inner peace, mindfulness, and awareness about my thoughts, feelings, and choices. Food fuels my body -- it tastes good when I'm hungry, but it's not an antidote to feelings or boredom. And actually sitting with the discomfort of bad feelings and processing them has been so much more rewarding and beneficial. Also, I used to eat lots of junk food and disliked most vegetables -- now, I eat a ~80% vegan, vegetable-driven diet based on cooking with whole foods!

Takeaways (ideas, not food)

• If you eat based on cravings rather than food as fuel and have trouble recognizing hunger cues, I highly recommend trying IF (even if you take a wider window than 8hrs). I did IF 9am-5pm, and waking up hungry in the morning helped me remember what it's like to eat because your body wants fuel and not just because I want to taste pizza for 2 slices worth.
• Only do exercise you enjoy! I see exercise as quality time with my body, to appreciate and tend to it. Not that it'll always be easy to show up, as that's the hardest part. But only do exercises where, once you get your butt to the practice, it feels good during (and not just after, when you're reaping the rewards for suffering through something you didn't like).
• This isn't a new take on emotional eating by any means, but just a reminder. When you emotionally eat, your body feels worse and the problem at hand does not change in any way shape or form. You will still feel sad after eating that sleeve of Oreos, just bloated too
• Don't think of binges by calories but by control -- even if you just had one Oreo, if you felt a compulsory need to (rather than a choice to), that's dangerous!
• If you are really craving a sweet in a compulsory fashion and don't think you can hold off that craving, bake it yourself. This puts some time between you and the craving (thus making it less obsessively fulfilled), has you get up to make the food, and usually results in a healthier version of the dessert than a store-bought one.
• I love foods that taste delicious (obviously), but am very wary of foods that are addictive. This indicates that, rather than tasting good due to quality ingredients and flavor choices, they're loaded with chemicals that want to trick you into endless consumption. Think most junk foods. Swap these for more wholesome alternatives, that taste just as good but allow you to have one serving happily. Again, I used to eat lots of junk food and disliked most vegetables -- now, I eat a ~80% vegan, vegetable-driven diet based on cooking with whole foods! When I want a cookie I let myself have one happily (as restricting isn't right or sustainable for me) -- sometimes you just want some chocolate! But I can happily have one serving, and also these cravings don't happen as often.
• Eat mindfully, whether it's a meal or a snack. Put the food into a plate, put the containers away, sit down with that plate, and put away the TV and phone. Taste your food, and feel your hunger subsiding.
• Do what is sustainable for you! For example, I dislike calorie counting, so I didn't, and opted to go off hunger cues and eating nutrient-packed, low-medium calorie foods so that I didn't have to worry about it too much. Another example: many people on this sub say that just because other people make you food out of kindness you don't have to eat it, and that is true. But the other day my friend spent an hour making beautiful Christmas-decorated sugar cookies, and while I'm sure she would have understood if I didn't want any, I showed my appreciation by having one (even though it was too sweet for me to really enjoy it).
• Weight is a mysterious formula that can be affected by so many things: water retention, bruises, PMSing, et cetera. So don't read into any one reading too much, just look at the general trend. And I recommend weighing yourself at most weekly. This helps get rid of some (not all!) of the insignificant fluctuation, and also stops you from becoming unhealthily attached to constantly knowing your weight
• Yasso ice cream bars are a godsend

If you stuck around for this whole lengthy post, then thank you for reading, I hope it is helpful!

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