Sunday, January 10, 2021

NSV: I put down the chips

Okay, so I'm really early in my most recent weight loss attempt. I don't know how much I've lost as I don't own a scale right now, but as far as I know, when I started I was around 420lbs, as a 5"11" 24 yo female. A lot of my previous attempts have been exercise based, but right now, due to chronic pain and hip issues that are still being investigated, I can barely walk. I use a mobility scooter. This is related to a genetic condition, but, evidently my weight is a factor. I kept asking my medical team to help me lose weight, as I've been on and off diets since I was 16. They keep pushing me to an NHS website with basic nutrition info I already know. I knew the battle was my mentality.

This is when it occurred to me: I had been suggested CBT would help for anxiety, why not try to apply it here? The doctors refused to help, insisting it was easy, and I should just get to it, so if I wanted to try, it would be self directed. I started making notes, and tried a few things.

Cut to today, about 2 weeks in. Bored, watching YouTube. I know that managing boredom is a big hurdle for me, and before I know it, I'm grabbing the chips and a jar of nacho cheese dip. I went to log roughly how much I intend to have before eating it. And it clicked. That many calories, for so little? Dang. I logged it and started eating anyway. With each bite, I felt like I was watching myself do this. Thinking how I'm not really hungry, and I should probably do something else. I ate half what I had logged, and put the chips and dip away.

This is huge for me. This doet of thing never worked on me before. I would have wedged the calories in, eaten the amount I logged, or more, and felt regretful after. Today I feel happy.

Tldr; discovered my weight is more a mental issue than a physical one, so tried self directed CBT to help. It seems to be working, as I was able to out away one of my favourite snacks because of it.

submitted by /u/Wistfultortoise
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