Today I want to get something off my chest. Apologize in advance if it has not much to do with weight loss.
29F 153 cm CW 81 kg GW 53 kg (abt 5' CW 178 pounds GW 115)
5 month ago I quit my job in order to work full time on my thesis in engineering. I stopped walking to my job and together with anxious eating, I gained 5 kgs (abt 10 pounds).
With time, I just got more anxious. To the point that, in the last 2 month, I don't even go out of the house much and be out in the open. Maybe once a week. Everything else it's like: car - do something - car - home.
Everytime I thought about being on the street, I felt scared, ashamed and judged. I still do.
Today I went to campus and my idea was to go to hidrogym after that. I have no idea where I got the strength to do it. I was shaking all the way... But once I got into the water, I felt so much better.
This week I will be defending my thesis. On one side I will be defending my work, on the other side, I will be in front of people feeling judged for my body.
I know I have been doing the work, it's been a short while, but I think everyday I feel a little bit better with my self. I hope one day I can shake that feeling that I don't belong, that shouldn't be here and that I should be locked away ashamed of my self.
Thank you for listening.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2FPbfbd
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