So my story starts april or may of 2018, I went to a weight loss clinic to see how much the program would cost (2500$) to expensive for me so I ended up not doing it. The one thing it did do though was make me realize how far I had fallen (que Fallen - Sarah McLachlan)
I went from around 299-310 most of my life up to 480 pounds which was the max on the scale and that still wasn't enough, I was most likely sitting anywhere between 500-510 which broke me completely, I couldn't believe how far I had let myself go.
so after about 3 weeks of clean eating after that I was back off the rails and binging day and night again, and at that point I kinda just said to myself "what ever your already broken no use trying to fix it" so I continued to eat like that until December this year. I ended up laying in bed thinking about all the things I was missing in life because of food, all the relationships I had lost because I was to ashamed to leave the house. I had become a shadow of my former self. I decided at that point that this wasn't about needing to self love my self because I hated myself, I hated how weak I was, I hated how disgusting I was, I hated how I destroyed myself for a few minutes of pleasure that food gave me. I decided I hated myself so much that I needed to kill that part of me off, I needed to change.
So I decided the first thing I needed to do was prove to myself I could say no to food. I successfully did a 3 day water fast and boy did it feel amazing. AMAZING I tell you, to realise that you CAN control yourself and from that point on I had no doubt I could do this. its now been 3 months and I have lost 80 pounds (best estimate as I was for sure over 500) I have stayed strict and its only getting easier, Take out?? sorry don't know her!...sugar?? sorry don't know her either!!! I now mostly live off water, veggies, fruit, and meat. I keep it simple, I take pro biotics to improve my gut health, drink a crap ton of water and make sure I get healthy fats. have I cheated? yup 2x I had a few slices of pizza on a movie night, and I also had a little bit of ice cream one night that's it.
The biggest change that I NEVER thought would leave was the feeling of "I need to binge" that feeling of needing to fill myself to a point I was sick, I thought I would have to live with that my entire life but I can honestly say I don't feel that way anymore, I no longer feel that need! and im so excited for what the future has in store for me!
Pictures! Before https://imgur.com/a/LUJCYTO
After https://imgur.com/a/pbTvafd
I still don't see a difference but im not surprised I got a long ways to go but I do feel a lot better in everything I do! wish you guys all the best of luck!!
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2ucOeb3
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