Many people here have been sharing their success stories. I am in need of help too. I am feeling like giving up now, after struggling for almost 5 years. But even if I want I can't give up on this. I'm stuck in my own mindset, lost all hopes energy and motivation but still can't accept myself this way. Any help and words of kindness is appreciated.
Here's a little background about my journey.
I have been on a weight loss struggle since age 21. I'm turning 26 in January. Back then at age 21-23 I couldn't take any action but see myself getting heavier as I was too caught up in my education. I did't had any time for myself, no friends and no social life. I had to study upto 14 hours a day and there were exams after every 6 months. I was a meritorious student since my school and due to immense expectations and pressure accompanied with exam failures I developed anxiety, anger issues and depression. I had a terrible relationship with me and with my parents, being an only child made matters only worse for me. At this time I developed binge eating disorder. I used to remain at my home and study day and night for months and food was the only variety in my monotonous life,so it became my boredom killer. When I turned 23 I was finally able to dump that course and found success in another, more qualitative career which I really like.
I came out of depression, and so ended all that continuous phase of binging, but I still have occasional emotional eating/binging and overeating episodes, and a terrible relationship with food to this day. I also have been suffering from a severe acne for the last 12 years, and have developed severe inferiority complex. Despite on receiving compliments on how I look but I cant seem to accept them. As a person having social anxiety, my weight and my acne is making matters only worse for me.
Now, I have been on a weight loss journey on and off since 2018 july and till now I've managed to lose just 22 lbs.My SW was 187 and GW is 121. I weigh 165 lbs as of today.
Initially my only motivation to lose weight was to be able to fit into my favorite clothes, while this remains the very core of my driving force to this day, but weight loss for me is now elevated above this thing. I see this as a failure on the part me me as a person, I often question myself, If I cant do a small thing like this for me what else I can do in life ? I still hate myself for doing wrong to me, my relationship with myself has improved but, I'm still having self hatred issues just because of my weight. I'm getting older and I just don't want to live like this.
I just want to ask that how you remained positive when your weight loss struggles don't seem to be successful despite doing everything right. Plus how do you manage to remain consistent over the time, what made you keep going ? My problem is that I cant remain consistent, I am an all or no approach person, either I give my 100% or -100%, which means at times I do everything that I shouldn't, No matter how intense my desire to lose weight is, it still can't fuel me up to remain consistent. I can't understand what makes me do self sabotaging behavior, I continually hate myself but cant change this behavior over the years. Because of this I get results but very slowly. I have tried many diets and approaches. Exercise is no more a problem for me, I have managed to change my perspective over it, from a kind of punishment for my heavy weight to a form of self accomplishment and a hobby. But my relationship with food is still keeping me away. I'm just fed up of myself now. I don't want to spend the rest of my life hating myself.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2qXSJIJ
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