Hi! Need a little advice.
So a little bit of background: I am a 23 year old female and have had an interesting history with weight loss. Up until college, I was at a healthy weight for my height (5'6") ranging from 130-145. I grew up playing a lot of sports and am very athletic. In college, I gained weight so fast. In two years I went from 140 to 200 which is insane. This completely changed how I viewed myself. I unintentionally got back down to around 185 halfway through college after studying abroad in Europe, and then after graduation I was back at 200 (204 being my highest as of this January).
I was super unhappy with the way I looked and felt. I wasn't eating well and wasn't exercising. I knew what to do but good old cognitive dissonance got in the way. I kept making excuses for myself and never changed or made a real effort.
Then the pandemic happened. The first day of lockdown I told myself: Ok this is going to go one of two ways. Either I get my shit together and mindfully try to get healthy, or I snack every second of every day and don't move. I chose the former. And somehow everything just clicked. Weight loss had always been SO hard for me and I never stuck with anything for more than a week in the past. This time felt different.
I spent my days walking or running 3-5 miles a day and started lifting heavy through the Peloton app. I also moved home during this time so had nice, balanced, whole meals that were nutritious. Large reduction in alcohol intake helped too.
Obviously the effects of the virus are widespread and heartbreaking and it would be ignorant of me to call it a "blessing in disguise." This being said, getting the chance to hit pause on life able to flip the switch on my habits has been so rewarding. I am now down to 181 since January.
Of course I am pleased with my progress; however, my issue lies in the fact that this weight isn't even close to what I started with. I've been here before and that's what is keeping me from feeling proud and happy. I know I have gained muscle and this 180 is different from my 180 a few years ago, but I still don't feel good. I just feel like I'm never going to get back to where I started and am discouraged. Have any of you ever felt like this or not been happy with progress since it's a number you've been at before?
thanks :)
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