Saturday, January 2, 2021

Almost at my gw, but I'm not satisfied!!

I'm a 5'3 (160cm), 17 year old female with sw: 70kg /154lbs (I'm not so sure since I used to avoid the scale, so it's an est.). My original gw was supposed to be 55kg/121lbs (since this was my weight in 8th grade). After 7 months, my cw is now 56kg/123lbs (with some muscle gainz) but I'm still not content and here's why.

I decided to lose weight since my goal is to become a part of the marine. When I stumbled upon this subreddit, I gained the courage to start my journey. From my journey here are some of the things that I learned from my mistakes:

-research, and I can not stress this enough. RESEARCH THOROUGHLY before making/changing a habit in your life. Going into something blindfolded is an easy way to mess your life up.

-weight loss is 90% eating habits and 10% exercise. So fix your eating habit first (CICO - calories in<calories out)

-do not quit eating your favorite things cold turkey. It will only make the temptation to eat it greater (due to restriction). Actually, you don't have to quit eating 'em at all. You can either find a low-cal substitute or just eat them in moderation (by moderation, I mean within your calorie budget)

-give yourself some slack. Do not be too strict on yourself. Love yourself more. This is a marathon, not a race. Do not beat yourself up for not losing a pound this week (for all we know, it could be due to you gaining muzzelzz ;)).

-rest days are a must (idiot me got to a point where I exercise 2hr+ EVERYDAY and my body gave out one day, thankfully, no serious injury happened and I'm a-ok). Exercising without rest days can do more damage than good. Your muscles need to recover. Now, I exercise 3x a week for 1hr+

-resistance training > cardio. Hear me out. Cardio is important to burn off extra calories but doing cardio alone does not build muscles and can actually burn through your muscle tissues. Muscle is important for a faster metabolism since it consumes more calories than fats. If you gain more muscles, you can burn off more calories even when you're at rest. Although cardio is effective for short-term weight loss, it is not enough if you want to maintain that weight (unless you're very much willing to grind harder by doing cardio on most days).

-water is essential. But it is not enough! During workouts, we lose electrolytes and strain our muscles. Water is not enough after working out. You must have enough carbs and protein immediately after working out (especially if it's intense) so that your muscles will have a much better recovery (I usually drink milk since it has a good carb and protein ratio). Silly ol' me have been doing nothing but drink water and regrets it badly.

-FOR THE LADIES: when you're having period cramps, MOVE/EXERCISE. Get your body's blood flowing. It helps a lot with removing the pain. I have bad cases of cramps every month and when I do, I cease all activities alltogether and just laze around, feeling miserable. But when I started moving around, these cramps are no more. With this, you not only burn calories, but also the pain :')

-rather than long-term, think short-terms many times. For example, rather than thinking that I should cycle for 30 mins, I say to myself that I should do 5 mins over and over again until I reach 30 mins by fooling myself.

-take things slowly. The human body is amazing but it is not omnipotent. When changing your diet, do not change it all at once. Give your body time to adapt.

-see what works for YOU, not for other people. We all have different bodies so not everything that works for other will work for you. I went keto for 3 months and easy to say, I'm not going back again. Reason? Constant constipation. I can do fine without carbs (mentally) but having little to none hurts my digestion. Now I do intermittent fasting so that I'll be able to eat less calories more efficiently.

-lastly, discipline is the key. Do not wait for motivation to come. Motivation is a fickle prick.

The things listed above are some of the things that I learned due to my idiotic self diving headfirst without knowing what will happen. This emphasizes my first statement of the list: RESEARCH. Honestly, I'm surprised that my body left unscathed. Don't be like me lol.

Anyways, after all is said and done, I'm pretty happy that I decided to go through with it. Now back to the main issue: I AM NOT SATISFIED. I know that people in this sub will congratulate me for coming so far and I shouldnt let myself down, yada-yada but shutdafvckup and listen (just kidding, thanks for the support kind strangers).

By saying so, I don't mean to say that I don't appreciate all the hard work that I've done. I do. I really do (still can't believe my lazy ass did it). But during christmas and new year, people whom I haven't seen/met in years dropped by our house only to tell me that I'm so big and chonky (since I have smol older sisters for comparison). They can be such assholes. Barging in on our house uninvited, acting like they know me (gosh I feel angsty just typing this out). Cringe.

Them saying that actually felt like a cold bucket of water smashed throught my face. So I looked at myself in the mirror, feeling as fat as I first started. Started feeling like crap until I realized myself I'm not (I lost 15kg+ for fvcks sake!). The dark thoughts stopped streaming in and I started to re-evaluate myself (#stoicism4layf).

My arms still have loose pudgy parts, my thighs are starting to form a gap but a small part still touches, face looking good wink but my jawline is not there yet and my stomach is almost flat but not quite. They were right. I am still fat. Not AS FAT as I was before but still noticeably fat. Turns out that I am still not done with this weight loss journey after all. I. Am. Still. Not. Satisfied.

I know that some of you sweet people will say: ignore those assholes. But honestly, I am thankful for their words. Because of them, I found a part of myself that I can improve on. Sure, I should still celebrate my victories, but being content too soon will not help me pass the PFT of my dream school.

With that, I shall take their statements with a grain of salt. My gw has moved from 55kg to whatever I will feel contented with (of course, within the bmi range lol, hopefully). I assure you guys that I feel more invigorated than ever to improve myself. I'll let them eat shit for when I have da 'bod. Thank yous and fvck yous are due to those assholes. Thank you for making it this far. Honestly, I ranted my heart out on this one. First time posting!

submitted by /u/totally_not_bottom
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