If you feel like giving up, remember why you started in the first place.

I have found myself slowing. My cheats are becoming more frequent. I've been wondering if I can sustain this. Sure, other people can and have. And I've been successful. I'm just feeling like I wonder if I can truly keep this up. I've already lapsed once, and now that I'm just about back to where I was the first time I lapsed, I'm having such a hard time.

Then I came across the quote in my title. "If you feel like giving up, remember why you started in the first place."

It gave me the perspective and the oomph I needed. I really truly do feel SO much better about myself. I'm 5'5" (F) and am hovering around 150lbs, looking to lose 15 to 20 more for a "goal weight". I don't think I've weighed that much since puberty. (Started my journey at 185 in 2018, got to 149, then crept back up to almost 170 before re-starting in Feb)

And then, in the evening I decided to let loose. I had a decent amount of booze which opens the door to what my brain REALLY wants - and that's food. I'm ashamed to say that once I got going, after ordering out for supper - I got going and couldn't seem to stop. I ended up eating a big bag of chips over the course of the evening, a bowl of ice cream, and a few oreos. Maybe not the end of the world, but absolutely obliterating any calorie goal ever (on top of the drinks). I woke up at 3AM feeling like garbage. Too much salt, too much fat, too much everything. And so, so ashamed. Sure, I'll get back on the horse, and I know that one or two slip ups do not define, but I'm currently in my moment of shame. Man. I SUUUUCK.

So anyway. I know that weight loss and maintenance is one day at a time. But my brain has such a hard time not wandering to the future and getting so stressed about sustainability. And while I do love that I can get active, I love walking and biking and playing sports and boxing workouts ... the pressure to eat properly and get in activity every single day when I just wanna be lazy after working full time and being a parent is heavy. And the looming knowledge that if I don't keep it up, I'm going to wind up unhappy with myself again and uncomfortable in my own skin makes me scared but I still doubt myself.

After all this time (2nd journey and lasting over a few months - I know some of you amazing people here have kept it up for YEARS and you're so inspiring) I thought it would be easier. I'd hoped I wouldn't still WANT the chips. That my body would stop wanting all that garbage. And while it feels so much better when I don't fuel it with garbage, the short term gratification is often always looming overhead in the form of cravings. And sometimes I do have a very small portion. And sometimes that works. I just guess I'm whining that I can't just do what I want.

So. I am going to try to keep the mantra going, to keep myself going. And to just keep going.

"If you feel like quitting, remember why you started"

​

Thanks for your time. Just had to get it out.

TL;DR
Losing weight for the second time and tripping up on bad foods. And feeling sorry for myself that I can't just eat the bad foods. Vent post.

submitted by /u/5iveOClockSomewhere
[link] [comments]

from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/3dhEGzW