TW: mention of drug use, mental health, eating disorder, and crash dieting
So, I (24F) have been on this weightloss thing for just shy of 10 years now. It started as a goal in my teens to get back into horse riding, but since I had no idea of how to regulate my calories and exercise, and having a family influence who favoured crappy fad dieting over long term lifestyle changes, I burnt out quickly and fell victim to my bullies and accompanying depression and low self esteem.
I've yo-yo'd in weight for years, my starting highschool weight being 121.8kg (I'm 5'7/170cm). Through almost starvation, binge eating, and excessive exercise I dropped under the 100kg marker briefly at 17 years old, but my mental health took a blow and I regained a lot of the weight I'd dropped. To be clear, I'm aware this was unsafe and I DO NOT RECOMMEND starvation as a form of weight loss.
In my early 20's I gained a further 20kg, peaking my heaviest recorded weight at 140kg. I was depressed, smoking weed every day, eating whatever I felt like, not exercising, and blaming everything I could think of other than myself.
Now, at almost 25, I'm proud to say that through focusing on my attitude towards food, shifting my eating habits, drinking more water and being active whenever I am able, I've dropped back to almost my highschool weight! I'm 122.3kg as of today! I'm also close to 3 months sober from drug use
I've still got a long way to go to reach my goal of 70kg, but I fell off the wagon severely and could have given up completely. That would've been so easy to do. Instead, I chose to get up and try again, and this time I'm sure it'll be more sustainable. Keep trying, and remember that if you do something for about a month it will become a habit. Make a conscious effort to create good habits and you'll be in a much better place than you were.
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