I've been with my boyfriend for five years. I developed an eating disorder early on in our relationship and he picked up on my bad habits. Ultimately I gained around 50-60lbs and he gained around 150lbs.
This has absolutely destroyed his self esteem and increased his anxiety tenfold. He refuses to meet my family because he is not "his best". I am wanting to get engaged soon but I will not allow that to happen until he meets them. My graduation is also coming up at the end of summer and I know if he does not lose a significant amount of weight by then that he will not go. Meaning he will miss one of the most important moments of my life... that essentially could lead to our relationship ending.
We have both lost some weight and put it back on a few different times. This tims I am completely serious about making sure I am in a calorie deficit each day and so far I have lost 17lbs.
However, he doesn't seem to be losing at all really. I try to make him more filling lower calorie meals. Obviously it is not good enough though. He tends to be "hungry" again right after dinner and then again late at night. This is when I feel he over eats. I do not keep junk in the house, yet he still manages to consume too many calories throughout the day with his snacks.
I'm at the point of feeling resentful towards him for not taking this seriously, especially when he knows our relationship is at stake. He may need professional help but he refuses to admit he has a problem. I want to just say screw it and let it go and keep working on myself but I can't help but think I'm wasting time.
What advice do you all have for me?
EDIT: I forgot to mention that I do not care what his weight is. I love him now more than when we met, regardless of the big difference in weight. That's not the reason the relationship wouldn't last, him not meeting my family and not being able to do things due to his weight would.
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