Wednesday, July 7, 2021

(TW: ED) Am I slipping into eating disorder tenancies?

So a couple months ago I went through a very turbulent time. After one year on half salary with my company (thanks COVID), I was laid off from my job and broke. A week later my boyfriend broke up with me because his feelings weren't progressing the same way mine were and he didn't want to lead me on if he didn't think it was going it happen for him.

Needless to say I was very depressed and my anxiety was at an all time high. I wasn't really sleeping or eating. This behaviour went on for a few weeks, until I found a new job and accepted that what my ex did was best for us in the long term. (We have actually decided to remain friends and hang out from time to time.)

Due to my bad eating habits during my sad time, I kind of stopped getting hungry? (That's the best way I can think to describe it.) Once I started healing, I started getting hungry again, and found I was now able to recognize what I feel is "true hunger".

I decided to give "intuitive eating" a try, and in the last six weeks my weight loss has been amazing, my energy has been through the roof, and I am sleeping better.

A friend of mine asked what my diet was and I explained it to her. She accused me of having an ED, and it's really messed with me. I'll share with you what I told her about my current eating habits/intuitive eating.

I basically eat when I feel truly hungry. There are days where I will have a protein shake for lunch and a small salad for dinner. I may hit 700-800 calories for the day MAX. However, after a two or three days of this, I will start to feel really hungry and I will have a couple good meals throughout they day, and I'll probably eat about 2200 calories for the day. I've been accused of binge eating.

Due to my new work schedule I am not working out at the moment, so I'm fairly sedentary. I know once I start exercising I will probably get hungrier,in which case I will eat more. Is this ED territory? I never feel like I am starving myself at any point.

I am only 5 lbs away from my goal weight and I feel like this technique is working really well for me. My friends comments are just not sitting well with me. Any feedback would be appreciated. Thanks.

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