Oh joy! My husband is now giving me the silent treatment because I had a long workout at the gym today.
We're a gay couple in our 50s, both obese - we each need to lose at least 80 lbs. I'm tired of feeling fat and unattractive and rejected by the gay community, so I have decided to do something about it.
I'm in the process of losing 85 lbs. To do this, I count all of my calories (1700 daily) and do a lot of cardio every day, to the point that I am really starting to lose a significant amount of weight (22 lbs down so far in six weeks, woohoo!) I go to the gym for cardio ~5 days per week, usually for 90 minutes per session, but today I was on a roll and went 150 minutes (2.5 hours). I felt alive, I felt invigorated, I was so happy with myself! And when I walked in the door all he said was, "What time did you go the gym today?", in a very accusatory, hostile tone. He's not spoken to me since, giving me a really strong cold shoulder.
I don't understand what the problem is - it's not like we don't see each other for all waking hours of the day (he's unemployed, I work from home as a freelancer for 20 hours per week.) When I have paid work, I do it. When the dog needs to go for a walk, I take her (twice per day, at least 30 minutes each walk - he hates doing it). I go to the gym when I can fit it in the daily schedule - but I always fit it into the schedule. For all other hours of the day we are together, in the same 1200 square foot townhouse. So why is he suddenly so angry?
I even stopped going to the gym with a friend of ours because it drove him insane with jealousy that we were spending time together without him (not that he suspected anything sketchy - we're gay, our friend is straight. The friend does weights, I do cardio.) I'm not sure what's going on - is he jealous that I am making progress or something? Is he mad because I only cook nutritious meals now, rather than the crap we have been eating for years (although he buys and eats whatever he wants)? I really don't know.
When I first started this six/seven weeks ago he didn't think I would be able to do it - but now the progress is becoming visible in my face and my clothes. Does he feel threatened by what I am achieving?
What am I looking for here? I'm hoping that there might be some others that have experienced similar behaviour from their spouses /significant others and can give me advice. Also, I need someone out there to cheer me on - I'm working my ass off and I want someone to celebrate it with me!
Sorry for the rambling ... I come here everyday for motivation, but I don't think I have ever posted here before. Just need to get this off my chest, you know?
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