I started my weight loss journey in late 2019 and wanted to shred just a few pounds and tone up. I learned about CICO and decided to start tracking my calories using MyFitnessPal. However, it ended up having the opposite effect. I started to become paranoid about going over my recommended calories and end up eating way less than what was recommended. I became obsessed with the numbers. This caused me to start binge eating since I was barely eating anything and as a result, I gained more pounds. This went on for months and I developed an extremely unhealthy relationship with food which still exists today. I decided to stop counting calories and just focus on portion control for what I eat but I struggled with that as well. My weight fluctuated so much in 2020...from being close to my goal weight to gaining more weight than what I started with. I felt really lost and confused. It's 2021 now. I initially planned to start fresh on the 1st but I went off trail as per usual. Regardless, I'm not giving up. I'm going to keep trying. The problem is...I want to try calorie tracking again but I'm so scared that I will end up repeating what happened last year. I don't want to repeat that cycle again. I guess I just don't really know where or how to start.
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