Monday, April 29, 2019

I'm So Frustrated! (Need to vent)

Over the past several years, my weight has slowly but steadily been increasing. I've thought for a long time that I need to lose weight, but I never had any real motivation to do so. Well, in January, my doctor ran some routine blood work, and we found out that I have high cholesterol, non-alcoholic fatty liver disease, and pre-diabetes. THAT was the kick in the butt I needed to get serious about weight loss. I don't really care about clothes size or how I look, but those numbers (especially to blood sugar) scared me. So on Feb. 1st, I started a low-carb CICO diet. I cut out all junk food, and my husband and I stopped ordering take out. I'm now on a 1200 calorie/day diet, watching what I eat, minding portion sizes, and I've upped my activity levels.

The good news is that I'm dropping 1-2 lbs a week, and in 12 1/2 weeks, I've lost 20 lbs! That's 9% of my starting weight. But yet, I'm so frustrated! I really don't care what size I wear, but I have not changed clothes sizes AT ALL. Nothing. 20 lbs down, and I'm STILL wearing a 20W. How? Just how? NONE of my clothes or jewelry fits any differently. I can't figure out where I'm losing the weight from. My eyelids? I always see people say they lost 20 lbs and dropped two dress sizes and such, but not me. I know it's not water weight, because (due to a medical condition I have) I drink 3-4 L of fluid--mostly water--every day. Second, and along the same lines, my husband started a CICO diet 4 1/2 weeks after I did, because he is also overweight and pre-diabetic, and he's lost 28 lbs, and he's down 2 pants sizes and 1 shirt size. We saw family for Easter, and several people mentioned that my husband looks like he's lost weight, but no one said anything about me. I'm really happy for him, but grrr! I know I shouldn't compare myself to him, or anyone else, but it's annoying.

The thing that is really bothering me though, is that I bought a glucometer on the advice of my doctor, and I'm checking my blood sugars regularly, and they are still in the pre-diabetic range. My doctor said that losing 5-10% of my weight should help all my numbers. Granted, I can't check my liver enzymes or cholesterol at home, but I was hoping to see some improvement in my blood sugars at least. But so far, nothing. (On the upside, my husband's blood sugars are now normal.) Plus, I'm not feeling any better than I did. I don't have more energy, and I still have a lot of joint pain. People always say they lost X number of lbs and feel so much better now, but that's not happening for me either.

I went into this planning to change my eating habits. I know I need to eat WAY healthier than I was. I figured if I was fairly strict initially, I'd break my addiction to junk, and once I am closer to a healthy weight, I should be able add a couple hundred calories a day back to maintain. I knew it would be hard initially. My husband and I opted not to have lavish meals to celebrate Valentine's Day, our anniversary, or my birthday. I skipped my annual Valentine's day chocolate covered strawberries and decided to forego a birthday cake this year. We didn't have any Easter candy, and we were very cognizant of what we ate when we got together with family on Easter.

I know three months isn't that long, and it's a short period of time to see major changes. And I know that overall, these changes I've made are really good for me, and I will get healthier over time. I check back with my doctor in a couple weeks to discuss how things are going, and if we need to make other changes. I know I'll end up much happier in the long run. But for the moment, it's just so frustrating, because I feel like I've given up a lot, and I'm not seeing the results I thought I would. Thanks for letting me vent.

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from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2IPQNcB

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