Just checking in. Lost about 45 pounds from my highest weight and agonizingly waiting to lose the last 1.4 to celebrate being under 200 pounds :-P Still a long way to go - 55 pounds or more.

This is the longest I've ever managed to stay 'on a diet.' It's been about four months, I think. In that time, I've had a large number of cheat days, but surprisingly, the cheat days aren't causing me any problems. It's those weeks when I'm chugging along, logging my calories every day, staying under my TDEE, but my hormones are saving up water and the scale won't budge. Those times are discouraging but I'm learning that I just have to keep going and the scale will eventually move.

I'm learning that it's much more important to be easy with myself than it is to be strict. Used to be, I'd be on something like the raw food diet. I would crave cooked food so badly that every time I went to the grocery store I would get fried chicken and macaroni from the deli case. So I ended up going to the grocery store every day. Now, I can have fried chicken every day if I want it. I just have to budget for it. And if I need to have a day where I don't count calories and just enjoy time with my friends, I do. I don't think of cheat days as days when I have to cram as much 'extra' food as possible into my mouth any more, either. I just eat as much as I want to and know that if I really want something, I can have a cheat day whenever I want.

I have certain days of my hormonal cycle when I am hungrier. I'm learning to just take those days to eat what I want. The important thing is that most days I stay below my TDEE. It averages out to a slower weight loss, but a LOT happier me, and it means that I am able to stay on this 'diet.' I had a few days a couple weeks ago when I was super depressed and I went off CICO for quite a while. But then I just went back to counting calories. No carb hangover, no sugar withdrawal, no getting used to not having bread. Easy.

You might think that I should give up on cheat 'days' and just allow myself some cheat 'foods' every now and then. But that would lead to high calorie counts every day. It's easier to be strict with myself most days and then let loose every once in a while, causing an average of lower calories. It's really about those days when my willpower is stretched thin and I need a break from exercising it. I've read about studies that say that willpower can be increased, but only gradually, and that if you exercise it too much too soon, it breaks. I think that's why CICO with cheat days works so well for me.

I had started out losing so quickly that I was hoping to lose all the weight by the end of the year. Dieting has been so hard in the past that I thought I couldn't sustain it more than a few months. Now, I'm just grateful I've found something I can keep doing for a long time. I can picture living most of my life like this. Once I've lost the weight I need to lose and I'm doing a bit more exercise every day, I'll have a higher calorie allowance and won't feel as restricted every day. I can continue to count calories, no problem. And if the scale goes up, I'll just diet for a few days. And on holidays I'll go ahead and binge like a normal person. I think this will work.

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