What do you do when you’re stuck in a routine of wanting to lose weight but not caring to?

Hope this makes sense.

I’m an obsessive weight loss person. I’ve been on a diet for 10 years lol. Sounds ridiculous. And you’d think I’d have lost the weight but nope.

My journey:

Started at 17F

Was 180 lbs

Then 200

Then 170

Then 270!!!!

Then 190!!!

Now 220

I’ve been cycling this way for the last 10 years. I calorie count. I know I’m eating over my limit and I do it.

I tried keto, weight watchers, doctors, high protein diet, stupid instagram diets.

I want to lose weight so badly, but at the end of the day if I wanted to I think I’d put in more effort but here I am NOT doing that.

I’m worried about stopping because that’s how I gain weight.

I recently started seeing a nutritionist who is so friggin expensive but she’s trying to help me. With her it’s the same thing: one good week, one bad weekend to mess it up. It’s been 3 months and I’ve only lost 5 pounds (and lots of money).

Has anyone been here? Any advice of getting out of this god damn rut?

Or any inspirational stories that’ll make me really want to lose weight?

I’m at my lowest tbh. I’m 26F, never been kissed and I’ve blamed that on being fat. I hate my body and it kills my confidence. I rarely leave the house unless it’s for work or school. I just hate my body and wish I could get a new one.

Anything would help

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