Wednesday, September 26, 2018

Worried about coworkers resenting me because of my diet...

Hello all, I know this probably isn't a big deal and I'm looking too far into things, but I figured I'd ask you guys for your perspective. A few years ago I weighed 210 pounds, and decided that enough was enough. I lost 35 pounds over the course of a few months, but then plateaued for a couple years. A year and a half ago I got fed up with my lack of progress and went on a strict 1,200 calorie diet and lost 40 more pounds. I am now at about 132 pounds, and am trying to finish the marathon (figuratively speaking) and make it to around 125 pounds. I count calories every single day and am very strict with what I eat and such.

I recently started a new job (a month ago) and everyone is incredibly kind and friendly. The work environment is amazing, and I love work so far. Unfortunately my boss commonly goes out and buys everyone Starbucks and lunch, but I've been really on top of politely declining. My coworkers/boss also bring in TONS of snacks and sweets, and our break room is stocked up. I'm really good at being self-disciplined so it hasn't been an issue, but my coworkers inevitably began to notice that I never ate any of the food they bring.

I've explained that I count my calories and have been working on weight loss for the past year, and they seemed to understand initially. Now, I don't say this in a rude manner, but my two female coworkers are very overweight. That's just how it is, and it might be contributing to what I'm experiencing. I've started to notice that they might be resenting me over time due to my diet, but I could just be paranoid. This really worries me because I hate conflict and care about having positive work relationships.

In the past they've told me that I'm "so tiny" and that they "never see me eat." The other day one of them kept pestering me to go take my lunch even though I wasn't hungry, and later in the day tried to get me to eat some of the snacks she brought. There have been many occasions where they've grabbed snacks from the break room and most times they offer some to me and act like I'm strange every time I decline the offer.

Here and there they've made comments about how they "have blubber" and "are chunky" and I always refrain from saying anything because it puts me in a really uncomfortable position. As someone who used to be very heavy, I'm not really cool with reassuring unhealthy habits, but it always seems like they are looking for some reassurance and I feel really bad. Just yesterday one of them was talking about how all of their shirts were huge and I just sat there not knowing how to contribute. I feel so bad.

Today I made a small mistake at work and joked about how I should order a dunce cap. One of my female coworkers said, "You're fine!" and the other said, in a seemingly mocking tone, "Oh, but she counts calories!" and it was super off feeling. It really had nothing to do with the conversation and it made me feel weird. I don't know why she brought that up.

Overall it's just a very weird situation, and I've only just started to notice that it's mentioned or food is brought up at least once a day. It's kinda starting to stress me out because food is a "trigger" for me (I hate saying that, but I really struggle with food in general and I'll even have dreams about indulging. I do think that I have a food addiction that I've been overcoming). I also want to have a good relationship with my coworkers, and it kills me to think that they could start to resent me due to a reason that shouldn't be their business. I hope I don't sound rude, I just am really hoping that I'm looking too far into the situation.

submitted by /u/mymidnightmelody
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