Stopping a binge that I shouldn't have been on in the first place may not sound like a victory, but for me it is a clear sign that this time my weight loss journey will be a permanent one. I know that only people here will understand what a big deal it is though, so let me explain why.
Usually when I binge it is a go all out sort of thing--I'm talking days of eating whatever I want and going out of my way to consume extra calories before "starting again Monday". At the best it was a single night of going wild, at worse it could be a week. Either way it always, ALWAYS, completely derailed whatever progress I had made. A binge was, inevitably, the beginning of the end of my journey. After all, once I failed it was pointless...right?
I've been skipping lunch at work and just eating some jerky or a granola bar if I felt hungry, and it saves me a good 500-700 calories in case whatever my wife makes for dinner is heavy. I got tired of planning around and having to count on her to always make the right thing, so I just plan for it. I eat less portions, for the most part, and I've been staying between 300-400 calories under my goal every day.
Yesterday she made grilled ham and cheese, which is one of my greatest weaknesses. She had already made me two sandwiches (usually I would eat three and a pile of chips), so I tracked those and was fine. Except she didn't want her other one, the kids didn't want it, and, again, I love grilled ham and cheese. So I ate it and instantly felt bad. Then I thought, why just call off the whole night and indulge in some chips? I grabbed a handful and ate those (which I still counted for some reason), then I dove into the Easter candy. I had managed to not eat any of the kid's candy at all over the weekend (a NSV in and of itself), so I was delighted.
Then something miraculous happened--I was three fun size Laffy Taffy in and had already opened bags of jelly beans planning to inhale something north of 700 calories in one go, when I suddenly realized what I was doing. I got my tracker out, tracked the extra sandwich, the candy, the chips, and put the jelly beans in a sandwich bag for the kids to share later.
I ended up only a 150 calories over my planned calories, which is easily handled by the last 4 days of being 300-400 under (without even counting exercise calories that the app adds). I'm ecstatic, because this has never, EVER, happened before. It is always a cycle of binge, feel horribly guilty, crack down harder on the diet, fail, and go back to my old ways.
This is a clear sign I've got this in the bag. It is just a matter of time now and I couldn't be happier.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2GJ3DWH
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