Anyone else stuck in a continuous loop of "it's going to be different this time, today is the day I get back on track" and then falling back into old habits?

This subreddit is mostly positive, so sorry to ruin the mood

For context, I'm a 6'2, 265lb college student.

When I got to college 3 years ago, I weighed about 180lbs. Over the course of two years, depression, stress, and poor choices lead to me gaining nearly 100lb.

Last summer, I decided to fix it. I started doing CICO, avoiding fast food, and drinking less. I went from 279 down to 240. I was feeling great.

Then I went back to class and work, and over this past year I gained it all back. It eats at me (no pun intended) every day, not only the fact that I'm fat and hate everything about how I look and feel, but that I fucked up and undid my progress.

I keep having moments where I decide that enough is enough, I'm going to get back on track and get back to my old self. But inevitably I run out of steam after a few days or a week and end up going back to bad habits.

I'm kind of worried that this is my life now. I never struggled with my weight (or even thought about it) until a couple years ago when I went from a healthy BMI to obese. I've seen my mother go through this over my whole life. She's borderline morbidly obese, and is constantly "starting again" when it comes to weight loss, but she's been doing that for 20 years and hasn't really lost anything.

Anyone else feel kind of stuck?

submitted by /u/Quinn___
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