I am 26F, 5'7.5''. Since childhood I've always felt a little chubby, though I was never very fat until I got older. In high school there was a time that I was about 135 lbs., but after high school I gained weight and got up to 200 lbs. in January 2017. In February 2018 I was at 190 lbs., and started counting calories. Today, I am 133 lbs.
I am mostly very happy, however am dealing with the after effects of being overweight, such as stretch marks on my small breasts, sides, lower belly, hips, and inner thighs (people tell me they are barely noticeable though). I still feel fat but I think I just need to lose a few more pounds and then gain muscle. Most troubling of all is the stretchy skin I have now. This is most noticeable on my breasts, when I grab the skin it wrinkles up, and when I bend over they look really weird. Also my stomach fat hangs weirdly and my belly button is down-turned.
I feel sexy still sometimes but am really struggling. I was more confident in some ways being very overweight though I carried it terribly mostly in my stomach and love handles. I really want the loose skin to go away. I hit 135 lbs. in April and am not sure if the few months of basically maintaining has helped much. I want to lose more but don't want my skin to look worse. I want to get in the best shape I can but feel hopeless with the skin. I feel self conscious about it. I just want to feel attractive and know that I am attractive to my boyfriend. I've had the same boyfriend throughout, we've always had a very good sex life, and he has also lost almost 90 lbs. and looks amazing (I always thought he was attractive).
Don't get me wrong, the weight loss has been worth it absolutely, and I am proud of myself. However, dealing with a damaged body feels like I'll be punished forever for ever getting overfat. I didn't know the consequences of being overweight (never thought about loose skin) and didn't know how to lose weight. I feel negative towards how I was brought up and the society of stupid marketing scams and diets for weight loss. I don't want anyone to ever have to go through being overweight; I wish there was more awareness and correct information in our society about it.
I've never struggled this bad with body image, even when I was way more overweight. I guess I always thought I could just lose weight one day and didn't know about the permanent damage. However, I also don't want to be so body focused, I know we all grow old and wrinkly one day anyway, if we're lucky.
Anyone understand? Will my skin improve? I'm sorry if this is hard to read. I just need to talk about it...
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2OdOm5j
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