Hello everyone! So I think that this post is going to be a little long, but I’ll be very grateful to anyone who reads this until the end. So I’m a 20 y.o. girl, i’m 4.7 and 110 lbs. And I’m desperately trying to get healthier and lose weight. Since 15 years old, hitting my lowest at 16, I have suffered from an eating disorder, but I with help of my loved ones, I have restored my weight when I was 18. When I have restored the weight, I felt free and calm, until one day that I have realized that I have trouble walking up the stairs, running, or do any kind of “sporty” activities. The reason for that was that I have gained too much weight, I was around 121 lbs, and this is too much for my body to handle, I felt big, some of the clothes didn’t fit me, and together with my boyfriend we went on a diet. This was last winter, and since I live in a very cold part of the world, losing weight in winter is hard. I have managed to get better without relapsing, but with healthy (I don’t even think that it’s so healthy right now) 700 calorie diet and a reasonable amount of exercise. When I lost weight, I felt happier, I felt comfortable and I felt overall great. But over a year, I have gained some of the weight back, and over the summer I’ve put on even more. Today, I don’t feel so good again, I feel the way I have felt before the last year’s weight loss. And for almost a month, I was trying to lose weight. The most comfortable way to lose weight for me is to by counting calories, but the problem is that when I see that I’ve exceeded a certain number (800), I start to panic, my brain tells me that eating such a HUGE amount of food will never help me lose weight. And today, I’m facing a problem. I can’t start, every day I wake up and take my healthy meals and snacks to college, but by the evening I’m here sitting with a bowl of pasta and telling myself that today’s been a hard day and I’ll start tomorrow. I guess that many people face this kind of problem. Also, when I’m trying to go on a diet alone, I’m always relapsing back to 100 calories per day, so I’m always going on a diet together with me boyfriend, because he really needs to lose weight (he’ s 6’1 and 246 lbs) Anyways, I’m gonna be short and ask a couple of questions: is 700 calories not enough for me? I’m pretty active, because I cycle everywhere, but since I’m student, I sit and study a lot. how should I “slide” into dieting and make it not a diet, but an actual lifestyle change? what do you do, when you feel that you’re close to eating that forbidden bowl of pasta or anything else? Thank you for your replies in advance, I desperately want to get fitter. Sorry, if there are any mistakes, English is not my native language:) Have a nice day!:)
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