Dear people of this sub,
Thank you all for your content and your insights. I really enjoy reading your stories, about your victories and the things that motivate and/or even irritate and bother you. During my journey I figured that most of us face the same struggles, but this community is amongst the most supportive I’ve ever seen on reddit. So thank you all - everyone of you rock!
So first of all I want to apologize for two things:
1: I‘m counting on the conversion bot to convert my metric values to the imperial ones. I hope this works. If not: sorry! 2: I’m not sure where this post is going yet. I want to share my journey but I guess I have some observations I may rant a bit about. Sorry!
So most of my adult (and late teen years to be honest) I‘ve been overweight, obese even by definition in some of those years. At my heaviest I’ve weighed 104 kgs. It took my parents wanting me to see a dietician when I was 18 to make me realize I had a problem. I probably don‘t have to mention that I. Was. Pissed. Of course I know now that my parents just wanted the best for me but at the time it felt like a punch in the face - today I‘m so grateful!
The dietitian helped and I‘ve lost 10 kgs. But she just substituted two of my meals with protein shakes. So once I started to eat normal again I would gain it all back.
Since then I‘ve pretty much tried anything: low carb, intermittent fasting, increase the amount of sports, etc etc. Today, 14 years of gaining, losing, gaining and losing again, I‘m pretty much stable in my goal weight range and I weigh 76 kgs as of this morning.
So I‘ve lost 28 kgs at 181 cm. My BMI is in the healthy range and I‘m almost there where I want to be.
I‘ve figured that the most effective things for me are: - CICO with some regard to my macros (mostly trying to reach my protein goal) - Running (I’ve hated running with all my guts when I started. But once I’ve gotten better at it it became kind of my meditation 3-4 times a week. Imagine your meditation also lets you eat more. How great is that?) -Meal prepping. Dude! Overnight oats, some fruits and a great lunch (no sad salad please. Thank you)? Sign me up. You’ll cherish eating a lot more when you’ve prepared the stuff yourself and you also know exactly what’s in it and makes CICO a breeze. Also you’ll feel a lot more prepared and focused on your goals once the question of „what will I eat?“ is out of the way. - relax. We all have bad days or a meal that we didn‘t need but NEEDED. DON‘t drive yourself crazy with the ambition to be perfect. Nobody is and it will eventually mess with your mind, body, attitude and motivation. - eat the dessert when you feel like it. Losing is a long term goal and you will need to stay motivated to succeed. - if you want to eat the same food for dinner as your family (hell yes) restrict your calorie intake for the day. Oh and it‘s most likely doable if you know what‘ll be for dinner the next evening so you can plan your day accordingly.
There is a song by Amy Winehouse that‘s called „love is a losing game“. I’d like to rewrite the title into „losing is a love game“. It took me years to realize and internalize this, but: I‘m losing weight because I love myself and I love my body, not because I hate myself or my body. I want to be healthy and reasonably sized the rest of my life and I won‘t succeed if I maintain my behavior out of self-hate. It’s toxic and it‘s tiring and just not where my mind is nowadays.
A couple of things I just want to add: - damn! My wedding pictures are really great by all means and I love them! But I‘d liked to having been as (skinny is more of a term used by women, I guess and thin has also a negative commotion somehow, so for a lack of a better word since English is not my main language) streamlined as I am today. But oh well, what are you gonna do?
If you want to compliment people about their weight loss there is just no right way to do it except for something like „you‘ve lost some weight. Congratulations. I’m proud of you.“ Stuff like „but now you could stop“ or „you look so much better“ are harmful in several ways and trust me. I’ve heard it all. What annoys me the most are people who say „are you okay? You kinda look ill. You looked better when you were heavier“. I still don‘t get what gives people the right to judge my body and my decisions? And I’m saying that as a man, I could imagine that even being harder for women.
But enough now. That‘s my story and since I‘m enjoying reading yours so much maybe mine will reach someone as yours reached me. Thank you reddit and thank you for bearing with me.
You are all beautiful works of art!
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