Am I being overly sensitive?
Yesterday was a friend from college's engagement party. Was great to see my closest friends of 10+ years. Now that we're all in our 30s and have jobs, kids, etc I'll often go 6-12 months without seeing them.
We all sat down for lunch and one friend who I've had probably gone the longest without seeing was being so kind and raving about my weight loss. He asked "how in the hell did you lose so much weight? It's amazing!" (I spent most of college 360-380lbs, hitting 415lbs the year after graduation. I'm at 245lbs now.)
I'm finally have real results and it's because me finally addressing my mental and emotional well being rather than ignoring it. So I shared that. It's not easy for me to be vulnerable but I think being open and honest is helpful. Mentioning how changing jobs, coming to terms with my anxiety and working through it, calorie counting, measuring literally everything to re-train my mind on portion sizes, intermittent fasting, etc.
Then my SO says, kind of looking over to my friend's wife who just had a baby and is carrying some extra weight "yeah but it's also easier because he's a man"
I know she didn't mean anything malicious by it. Like sure, yeah I can eat more calories because my TDEE is higher as male but man I felt so fucking bummed out. Like it just discounted all my work because I'm male. It's been anything but easy.
I was 200+lbs by age 10. I was 300+lbs by high school. I was bullied. I had very little self-esteem growing up. After college I felt so isolated. I spent most of my 20s living alone in a studio apartment. I spent many nights binge eating and drinking until I was sick just hating myself. I'm finally the healthiest I've ever been but it's literally been 15-20 years in the making with dozens of failure along the way.
On the other hand I'm aware how much of a trigger my weight is and I know I can make a mountain out of a mole hill on the topic. So I don't know.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/31uYZDP
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