Hi! 19F 5'3 SW: 134 CW: 115 GW: 110
I've been on a weight loss journey since February. This wasn't the first time I tried to lose weight. I lost a bit of weight 3 years ago (which was like 8lbs within 2-3 months) by exercising, moving around, and restricting calories. I'm that typical girl who didn't care how she looked since I knew whatever I did wouldn't change how ugly I was but I tried to lose weight since I connected that to the reason why I felt uncomfortable and ugly especially when you live in a house that always made you the butt of the fat jokes.
By the time I got back to school, my friends were surprised that I suddenly had this "summer glow up" and were happy for me. That was when I started to smile more in pictures and actually care about how I looked in the mirror.
Anyway, after that I got comfortable with myself and gained 10lbs over the span of 3 years. I know it isn't much as compared to the many people here, in fact, I consider that really slow. But that extra 10lbs was showing on my face again when several friends pointed out my face was "getting round" again. I wasn't offended or hurt at all when they commented that, I knew they had no intention to make me feel bad, but it just made me more mindful that I was putting on weight again.
By the time I entered my first year of college last year, I noticed how fashionable and stylish everyone was at the university. Everyone gave out this confident, outgoing and sociable aura that I couldn't keep up with. I started being conscious of the way I looked again since I end up comparing myself to everyone there. I wanted to match the pace of the students there and I knew I wasn't going to get anywhere by being shy and timid and having low self-esteem. So I decided that learning to love myself was going to be my first step into improving myself.
As shallow as it may seem, I realized I couldn't love myself when I felt so uncomfortable in my own skin. That was when I decided to lose weight. Back then, 110lbs seemed so far away for me. I hit a plateau at 123lbs after 2 months in and cried several times, losing hope that I'll even reach pass 120lbs, contemplated many times if I should just maintain what I was.
Thankfully, lurking in this sub helped me get my motivation and discipline back. I managed to stay on track, consistently workout and break my plateau. Now, 2 months later, I still find it hard to believe I'm 19lbs down and 5lbs away from my goal weight. I still remembered how my family laughed at my face when I told them my goal weight. They mocked me, saying it was impossible, and look at me now! :D
I know 19lbs isn't a lot, especially within a span of 4 months, when others could do that within 2 months and even lose a bit more. But I just wanted to share this tiny milestone of mine. I hope all of you, who may have lost their motivation, don't give up.
Slow progress is better than no progress.
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