How do I do this?

I'm 17, female, and I'm 195. I lie just about every day and say I'm 180. I say every afternoon tomorrow is the day I get back on track and lose the weight, but that tomorrow always gets delayed. I lost 50 pounds my freshman year, my lowest weight being 160 when I had mono, and steadily over the course of high school, I've seen my weight increase until now, senior year. It's jumped, and it keeps going higher and higher and I'm sick of promising myself a tomorrow I don't have the will power to obtain.

I don't know how I did it back then. I can't even fathom it. So, I've come here on my main account. No throwaways, no hiding behind a one-day-old account, just accountability and a reminder that it's time to get on track.

My biggest issue is that I've developed a habit of binge eating, stress eating, and eating out of boredom. Aka, I always am eating something nowadays. I will admit that I have pretty severe depression so that plays a huge role in how I act in regards to weight loss.

The truth is, I really like the taste of food, and when I'm at school and have the option of taking my lunch or eating what they provide I always choose them. I've brought my lunch ten times this year so far and only ate what I brought once. Every other time I leave it in the classroom and say I forgot. I didn't. I just wanted to eat chicken strips.

I used to have a decent exercise routine and did a 40-minute Tabata routine every other day then would walk a few miles on the weekends or after school. I just don't feel like doing those things now. I'd rather go home, nap, and basically wallow.

Basically, I've come here to be held accountable. I'm here to be told straight because I'm tired of coddling myself and surrounding myself with other people who eat their feelings and end up balking when I even mention trying to lose weight. I'm stuck in an echo chamber.

How can I lose the weight and get it into my head that I need to stop being lazy? How can I do it again?

submitted by /u/Centariousso
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